Inhalage....

... you know, I spent the better half of the evening eating exotic food prepared by people from far away, watching television programs about the horrific angst of high school proms, and drinking various adult beverages brought to my household from across many continents....... and it was good......

..... just five minutes ago I ventured out to my garage to imbibe in some Turkish tobacco inhalage, and I noticed my ceiling fan whirring about me courtesy of the local nuclear power plant at Watts Bar........

..... there must have been 50 bugs - beetles mostly - circling the fan as I gazed upwards....... and every five seconds one of them would get batted down towards Earth with a wild thump of a fan-blade........ and they'd pick themselves up, double-check their wings, and set off towards "the Sun" once again...... only to be crunched asunder by the spinning blades in less than thirty seconds.......

.... I swear, it was an almighty sight just watching those idiot bugs get battered......

...... and here's the rub, folks....... THEY evolved long before we supposedly did, right?...... why is it that I can sip scotch and smoke oriental tobacco after having watched actors get murdered in a B-slasher flick, and those bugs are still dumb enough to think that the light bulbs in my garage are somehow representing the Sun at 9pm at night?.......

... Jesus Christ, you'd think that after all these years of evolution I would at least be able to walk outside and ask one of them casually for a light...... or directions to the local mini-mart?.... or perhaps which political party is going to do the least damage in the next election?.......

..... good god.... after 300,000,000 years of evolution, you'd think that an insect would at least have an opinion......

.... but, no..... they don't....... they just keep whirring, whirring, and whirring........ and making me want another gin and tonic.......

.... perhaps evolution isn't all it's cracked up to be.....

... and yes, you just witnessed the creation of a new word.... "inhalage" is all mine....... how's that for evolution?....

.... watching those bugs reminds me of watching the bloody news lately...... how come we keep electing insects?........

by Eric on April 08, 2011 | Bullshit (0) | TrackBack (0) | Ummm, Ok....
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