Missing.....

..... living in the wilds of East Tennessee is always a bit of an adventure, and since I have now received inquiries about the fate of our skunk from two separate directions, I'll spill it...

.... firstly, I will preface this story by saying that a skunk is a fearless beast.... and every other animal in its right mind offers them an extremely wide berth - and for good reason as we all know.... however, having said that, I DID attempt to introduce my skunk to the hereafter - and I would have accomplished the mission had the little bastard showed up just thirty minutes sooner than he did.....

... as skunks go, I suppose that he was luckier than most.... I'd say he was clever, but I haven't enabled my psyche to admit that I was outwitted by a rodent yet, so I'll stick with the "luck" angle..

... anyway, I laid my trusty .22 rifle out and began waiting for the skunk to arrive for breakfast, lunch, or supper.... as it turned out, he must have had a hard day in the woods because he didn't show up at my house until just after 9pm.... this completely messed up my plan for his demise, though, since I had envisioned dispatching him with a highly-accurate, scoped .22 rifle shot to the noggin once he'd exited my garage....

.... well, I positioned myself down my driveway and to the right of the house so that I would enjoy a clean lane of fire between the edge of my house and the woods to the back and side.... standing there in the dark holding my rifle, I realized the folly of my picking a weapon that sported a scope, but by then it was too late...... the skunk was on the move and I didn't have time to run back inside to collect my .12 gauge....

.... I ended up finding the black animal through my scope in the dark for only a fraction of a second, and I fired off three quick rounds..... the skunk fled into the steamy night, and I ambled back inside feeling absolutely crestfallen that I had missed him/her.... I was particularly unchuffed because, up until that night I was 8 for 8 with that rifle..... I'd only fired it eight times since I'd owned it, and each shot had brought down a furry woodland creature of one sort or the other....

... I checked the ground for a blood trail the next day and found naught, so I suspect I only frightened it...... but, I am happy to report that it has not been seen nibbling cat treats since...

.... so, now y'all know what happened to (or didn't happen to ) the skunk...... you guys have Bou and Zonker to thank for the update....

by Eric on August 03, 2010 | Bullshit (5) | TrackBack (0) | Ummm, Ok....
Bullshit So Far

Flashlight?

Bullshitted by Rey B on August 3, 2010 04:24 PM

Aw - man I was hoping the world was now short one skunk. I can't fault you for missing in the dark - damned if I could hit it in broad daylight! However, I guess it's all good if it doesn't come back to add an extra pungent aroma to the garage. ;-)

Bullshitted by Teresa on August 3, 2010 07:06 PM

If it comes back and you do need to shoot it, any plans to decontaminate should it expel its elixir of disgust upon being shot. I imagine that its muscles will relax and allow any retained musk to ooze out. I would not want that fine aroma anywhere near my home.

All the best,
GB

Bullshitted by Glenn B on August 4, 2010 08:06 AM

You missed? Damn. Good idea to take the shotgun along with the .22...and remember, shooting a skunk stinks. Remember, take it out from as far away as possible. Trust me on this.

Bullshitted by Yabu on August 4, 2010 08:29 AM

Eric,
Have a seat, son. I think it's time that you and I had a little talk. About bi-focals.

Bullshitted by Jerry in Indiana on August 5, 2010 04:23 AM