Air.....

.... so The Missus and I are sitting around this evening watching a program about the terraforming of Mars, and they bring up the fact that it is uninhabitable mainly because of the lack of greenhouse gasses AND that it is just plain WAY TOO COLD......

..... now, she has already read all of the "Mars" series of science fiction books from Kim Stanley Robinson, and she ate every one of the trilogy up with lip-smacking enjoyment.... me?.... I'm just not that into science fiction.......

.... so, fast forward to this evening....... she is sucking on every word from the presenter about terraforming Mars, when they mention that it is way too cold there for human habitation.......

..... I pipe up, "good god!.... if it is too cold, then build a damn FIRE!.... it'll create plenty of carbon dioxide..... and that will help create a warmer atmosphere, supply green house gasses, and make everyone up there feel a bit less chilly!... and with all the ash left over, you could use that as a base for soil and plant some damn TREES!"....

.... ten seconds later, the presenter of the show said that they needed to basically "build a fire on Mars" to create greenhouse gasses so that they could eventually plant Earthborne high altitude conifers to assist with the creation of a breathable atmosphere.........

..... I belly-laughed and said, "see!.... see?!..... Goddamn, woman, I should work for NASA!.... 'It's cold on Mars, people, what should we do??'..... 'Build a FIRE!'....... damn, but I am an undiscovered genius".......

.... anyway, (and to get to the point of this nearly pointless post) she dug into me again during a commercial.....

... "You know what?", she said...... "next October we should get NASA to fly all of the Jawja Bloggers up to Mars instead of having them come here for the weekend....... hey, you could even take your own firewood!...... and I bet that the combination of 25 Jawja Bloggers, the others that come, AND the fact that y'all would have a campfire to watch while you drink your chocolate vodka, well, I am quite sure that Mars would have an atmosphere in less than a week........... for, after all, no one can emit hot air like a bunch of half-drunken bloggers standing by a campfire........ good lord, we've seen it for the past FIVE years!...... no wonder our trees are doing so well in the back yard!!.... it is from their annual mega-dose infusion of blogger-based carbon dioxide emissions!".......

..... and in retrospect, I think she may be right....... after all, her logic is fairly secure...... the dogwoods ARE blooming especially pretty this year after those bloggers spent those two nights camping underneath them.....

...... but, wow.... that means that the next Hysterics at Eric's must be a precursor to us having a blogmeet on Mars....... any takers?....... The Missus assures me that it will be for the greater benefit of All Humanity For Generations to Come.......... so, there is that...... or do I have to go this one on my own?........ hey, I'll bring Scotch and bottle rockets!..... and I am sure that Jimbo will bring the vodka.....

by Eric on April 05, 2010 | Bullshit (13) | TrackBack (0) | Blogging
Bullshit So Far

I've already been to Mars. Well, it was WalMars, but that counts, right?

Bullshitted by LeeAnn on April 5, 2010 10:03 PM

Hmmm LeeAnn has a point. Of course red is a good color for me so I wouldn't mind a trip to Mars - but I don't like the cold much so maybe I'll show up about 12 hours into the meet... you all will have a nice bubble of hot air just expanding away. I think that timetable works for me.

Bullshitted by Teresa on April 5, 2010 11:37 PM

I've got a snazzy down sleeping bag and plenty of Scotch. Is fart-gas a greenhouse gas? Got plenty of that, too. Very helpful on Mars, but it's a long trip from here to there, and in close quarters...

Bullshitted by Elisson on April 5, 2010 11:53 PM

Elisson beat me to it but that many bloggers in a cramped space as required for transport would be a combustible mix long before reaching Mars. Of course the resultant fire would jump start the whole warming and atmosphere thing. "One small flatulence for man, one giant fart for mankind..." (Forgive me Neal Armstrong)

Bullshitted by Rey B on April 6, 2010 08:25 AM

Well if your willing to take a Georgia expat, depending on the dates I might be able to ease that way for a weekend or so ;)

Bullshitted by BloodSpite on April 6, 2010 03:05 PM

... bhwahhaha..... you guys are killin' me.... seriously.......

Bullshitted by Eric on April 6, 2010 08:27 PM

Well, I was going to ask if we could go to Venus instead, but I looked up the surface temp and it's like on avg 450 deg F. So, I guess Venus is out and we're stuck with Mars.

Bullshitted by Bou on April 6, 2010 09:10 PM

I'll bring the BBBC, and after that...you won't care what temperature it is.

Bullshitted by Yabu on April 7, 2010 07:36 AM

Damn Yabus going. I guess he doesn't know that dependable space travel requires going in American made transport.

Rick

Bullshitted by recondo32 on April 7, 2010 08:50 AM

Science!

Bullshitted by Rube on April 7, 2010 06:43 PM

@recondo32

You just slapped the Blade. He, also, moves about in German made transport. Seriously...if it wasn't for German rocket scientists, there would be no American space anything.

The truth will set you free.

Bullshitted by Yabu on April 8, 2010 11:15 AM

E,
You are destined for greatness, you're just taking it easy so you don't freak us all out. Can i take my smoker? A hickory smoked brisket emits a TON of greenhouse gas.

Bullshitted by The Piper on April 8, 2010 11:36 AM

You should try reading some KSR -- your bride is spot on! I'm just re-reading the Mars series -- it's not really science fiction, per se. The dude knows his science and the schieze he writes about is very well thought-out speculation (which is why some writers are referring to this sub-genre as speculative, rather than science, fiction. KSR is a very smart guy!! But, I agree, a bunch of you Jawja gangsters could probably create an atmosphere in nothing flat!!! Great idea!

Bullshitted by Marianne on April 12, 2010 01:27 AM