...... I visited a bookshop today during the course of my ramblings around Chattanooga...... I was searching for Christmas presents to send overseas, and I ended up quite successful in the end......
..... however, upon reaching the checkout counter I was greeted by a tiny children's book perched there for "charity" purchase....... the title of the book was "Is Your Mama a Llama?"
...... I handed my three purchases to the bespectacled 17 year old brunette behind the counter and said audibly, "huh?".....
..... she scanned my copy of "1001 Movies To See Before You Die", popped her bubblegum, and glanced at me..... "huh?", she replied.....
...... I pointed at the book and said, "Is Your Mama a Llama?".....
..... "Oh! Yes!", she chirped..... "it's a book we're selling for charity!".......
..... she adjusted her glasses and scanned my copy of "The Collectible Depression-Era Glass Pocket Guide"
.... "What an unusual title for a book", I said.......
.... she smiled broadly and said, "ooooh, yeah"........
..... her machine beeped again as she scanned my copy of "The Onion's World Atlas".....
...... "Do you know the llama poem by Ogden Nash?".....
.... "ummm, no, I don't..... who is Ogden Nash?"......
.... "oh, a poet, I guess.... that book title just reminded me of one of his poems..... it goes like this.." .... and so, I began.....
The one-l lama,
He's a priest;
The two-l llama,
He's a beast.
And I will bet
A silk pajama
There isn't any
Three-l lllama
.... and then added, "of course, he later recounts the lack of a three-l lllama when his wife asks him about a 'three alarm fire' and calls it a 'three alamah'".......
*crickets chirping*
....... people, you have never seen a more slack-jawed Chattanoogan in your lives...... hell, when I finished talking, signed my receipt, and headed for the door, I felt a wave of embarrassment wash over me from head to foot.........
...... who knew that a knowledge of Nash could cause such awkwardness?........... perhaps I should have kept my poetry to myself and just forked over the cash for the children's book......
..... then again, you'd think that someone who works in a BOOK STORE would have read a few, right?.......
I wouldn't have been embarrassed. I would have felt pity for the bookstore clerk for having missed out on one of Life's little beauties.
You and I, we could have a Nash-quoting contest one day. It'd be a corker.
Some primal termite knocked on wood
And tasted it, and found it good!
And that is why your Cousin May
Fell through the parlor floor today.
Bwahahaha!
I'm with E... SHE is the one who should be embarrassed. What a hoot.
Bullshitted by Jean on December 4, 2009 12:12 AMWelcome to incipient codger-hood. It won't be the last time some clever comment uttered in full sincerity is greeted with slack-jawed disinterest.
It happens all the time to me...
Bullshitted by wil on December 4, 2009 01:09 AMMan, what I would give to just sit for 45 minutes with you... listening to share some story (as you do in your blogs).
I've said it before, I love your blogs.
My daughter is nine and my husband will no doubt know exactly who Nash is... I think this little house up on rolling hill might need to pay Mr. Nash a visit.
As for the girl behind the counter... she must have been a little slow because I got the joke and I'm not the brightest bulb in the fridge... LOL
*Pondering if it's right to admit that?*
Who cares, cats out of the bag now. =)
Bullshitted by Livy on December 4, 2009 01:22 AMOgden Nash was a staple in my household and my daughter does quote him. Here is an example from her blog http://skybag.blogspot.com/2008/03/ogden-nash.html Of course, her odd sense of humor could be another reason she is not married. We also quote Shel Silverstein.
Don't feel embarrassed, our 17 year old daughter, Danielle, also reads and quotes Ogden Nash. Our other daughters have other reading interests but they ALL love to read prolifically. Guess the poor girl has never been properly introduced into the world of literature DESPITE working in a book store!
Bullshitted by Lemon Stand on December 4, 2009 01:11 PMShe's probably just waiting for the movie to come out. The part of the Mama to be played by Shirley Maclaine
Bullshitted by kdzu on December 4, 2009 02:56 PMI got the same reaction from the Brit-wife just now.
Of course she had her bad sci-fi on, too..........
"Ogden Nash?????"
Bullshitted by Kurt P on December 4, 2009 11:28 PMWell, I suppose it's about the same as the girl working at the Barns and Noble in NYC. My sister went in to look for a particular book. She stopped a girl who worked there and asked about it. The girl's response...
Who's the arther?
As for me, I can never remember enough to quote more than a line or maybe two of anything. But I must find a Nash and read it again - you remind me it's been too long.
I must admit, I don't know much Nash... Had you not included the Ogden portion of his name, I'd have thunk you were speaking of the basketball point guard, Steve Nash, and I would've been suprised that he wrote poetry. Call me an asshole... you won't be the first, or last. You're a well read man, brought up before the likes of teenage mutant ninga turtles, barney, and atari. Shit dog, I grew up on Captain Kangaroo, Mr. Greenjeans(I don't know what made 'em green), and Lucy. Ok, maybe I lied about the atari a little bit 'cause you might not be that old. But hell, I'd have at least kept the gum in my mouth and offered to buy you a beer.
Bullshitted by RedNeck on December 5, 2009 01:38 AMMy Grandma brought me a couple of his books when I was sick when I was as a kid. Great entertainment!
Bullshitted by Cowboy Blob on December 6, 2009 01:09 AMA small confession, I must make
For my profession, I do rake
A salary from a tabloid
Of which I do not read a woid.
:)
Bullshitted by Erica on December 6, 2009 03:10 PM