Ham.......

.... as soon as I return from my vacation in The Olde County, I'm definitely going to do my very best to emulate The Maximum Leader......

.... good god..... nothing says "The South" like a salt-cured country ham... and after a jaunt overseas, I figure that a day spent cooking a ham would be the perfect "welcome home"..... besides, I reckon all that delicious saltiness will be just about perfect for cutting the grease from my veins after feasting on haggis, smoked sausage suppers, and deep-fried Mars bars for 11 days.....

... in other news, I spent the better part of today washing the gravel from the path that leads from the deck to the patio..... damn, that was weird to type, but it is 100% true...... and no, I don't mean that I was washing the gravel FROM the path like something you'd imagine Thoreau would pen .... I mean that I was physically removing the gravel from the path with the help of a shovel, dumping them into a wheelbarrow, and then using the hose to wash the gravel free of a winter's worth of soil accumulation..... trust me, today would have killed a bird-watching, lake-walking, quill-penned transcendentalist....

.... it's odd, I guess...... a day of honest labor has left me tired, sunburned, a bit sore, fairly dirty, and smelling more than just a little bit like a well-ridden horse..... yeah, think lather, sweat, and extremely bad breath..... I imagine that my smell alone would have caused most members of Emerson's entourage to have run for the hills at first whiff......... but the good news is that the next two days are predicted to be equally as beautiful as today has been..... and two more days of hard labor should just about finish the repairs to the path.....

..... I think I should write a poem tomorrow about washing gravel....... hell, I'm pretty sure that such an endeavor has never been attempted before in the history of mankind (for a very good reason, no doubt.).......

..... I just don't know....... but as of right now?..... I leaning towards a limerick.....

by Eric on April 26, 2009 | Bullshit (12) | TrackBack (0) | Blogging
Bullshit So Far

I'm sure Elisson has already thought of something before he got to the end of your post. He is a Human Poem Generator.

Bullshitted by Erica on April 26, 2009 10:01 PM

Each to his own I guess but that's a mighty long time to prepare and boil a ham.
My grandpa used to be the holiday ham boiler.
He'd wash off the ham, cut off the hock, and soak it over night.
Then he'd put it in a lard stand, hock end up, cover with water and boil it hard for about 2 hours. Then he'd remove it from the stove, put the lid on the lard stand, and wrap it in old blankets(top, bottom, and sides) to insulate it and let it sit for 24 hrs.
Then he'd take it from the lard stand, pull off the skin, trim off the excess fat and it was ready to eat.
He never bothered with a glaze as he said that was just a prissy way to present it.
All I know is it ate mighty fine that way and the after holiday leaving's made as good a ham salad as I've ever had....
Just a thought.

Bullshitted by Tbird on April 26, 2009 10:12 PM

O/T But I just wondered why when I click on TALK I get the message that due to high spam levels I cannot leave a message and I don't get the messages to read. If I click on PERMALINK I get the messages and can leave a message. Just does not compute.

Using Firefox and Linux.

Bullshitted by dick on April 27, 2009 09:56 AM

O/T But I just wondered why when I click on TALK I get the message that due to high spam levels I cannot leave a message and I don't get the messages to read. If I click on PERMALINK I get the messages and can leave a message. Just does not compute.

Using Firefox and Linux.

Bullshitted by dick on April 27, 2009 09:56 AM

O/T But I just wondered why when I click on TALK I get the message that due to high spam levels I cannot leave a message and I don't get the messages to read. If I click on PERMALINK I get the messages but still cannot leave a message. Just does not compute.

Using Firefox and Linux.

Bullshitted by dick on April 27, 2009 09:57 AM

Correction - I can leave a message but still only can get there from permalink, not from talk.

Bullshitted by dick on April 27, 2009 09:58 AM

The pathways on which I must travel
Are constructed from dirt and from gravel.
It'd be a nice trick
To replace it with brick
Or with asphalt. I hate that damned gravel.

And so, in the back of my hovel,
I'm frequently seen with my shovel.
It's for digging that gravel
Over which I must travel.
And now I must level my gravel.

Bullshitted by Elisson on April 27, 2009 11:11 AM

Wow. Elisson is FAST!

And maybe a G&T would help the soreness... You need to find some kids in the neighborhood to do that stuff for you.

Bullshitted by Richmond on April 27, 2009 03:00 PM

Sent you one -- but your spam filter is very particular!!!

But am I to understand you are actually washing gravel? Seriously? You're picking up rocks and washing them and putting them back?? If that's what it is, that's some state-funded road project, isn't it?

Bullshitted by Kath on April 27, 2009 03:27 PM

Sounds like government work to me.

If you feel the need to shampoo the driveway, I'd probably seek professional help at that point.

Bullshitted by Andy on April 27, 2009 03:45 PM

It may have run off Emerson, but you would still be left with Lake and Palmer.

Bullshitted by Cappy on April 28, 2009 05:45 PM

dick- I hear ya. Same problem. I can post on some previous posts but not the latest one.

Bullshitted by JihadGene on April 29, 2009 12:57 PM