HBO....

…. Whomever decided to do a remake of “The Avengers” and cast Ralph Fiennes, Uma Thurman, and Sir Sean Connery in the leading roles needs to be dragged off and shot…. As a matter of fact, the storyline was so monumentally lame that it wouldn’t have mattered WHO you would have cast, the movie would have still sucked giant monkey balls….. but Ralph Fiennes and Uma Thurman?... gimme a break…..

… hell, the only saving grace through the entire movie was the scene where Connery was beating the shit out of Fiennes with that big metal stick of his… but even that didn't last long.... after five minutes or so, Fiennes got the upper hand and killed Sean…. talk about a letdown? …. yeah, that one was major….

… oh, and I watched “The Weatherman” last night….. and I’ve gotta give props to ole Nick Cage… the man can certainly take a chocolate Frosty upside the head with true grace and bearing….. of course, even watching Nicholas being continuously pelted over and over with various fast-food beverages wasn’t enough to save the picture…..

… indeed, a more dire storyline would be hard to imagine….. and trust me, I’ve got a pretty vivid imagination…..

…. The only good thing about “The Weatherman” was that I saw it on HBO and not in the theatre…. I mean, had I actually paid money from my own pocket to see it, I would have been royally pissed…. As it currently stands, I can almost rationalize the fact that HBO put the “The Weatherman” on primetime for my viewing pleasure…. almost…. But hey, I do have 249 more channels….. so I can’t blame HBO fully…. I could have hit the channel button at any time…..

… actually, I’ve kinda gone off Uma completely now…. she’s still a beauty, but she’s just that wee bit too scrawny and stick-like…. waspish….. but goodness, she was just about perfect way, way back when John Malkovitch “tutored her” in “Dangerous Liaisons” …. Come to think of it, I suspect that movie had a greater impact on me that I realized back then…… Uma’s heaving breasts, John’s malformed grin, groping hands, petticoats, and me a stumbling, fumbling, wide-eyed 16 year old more akin to Thurman’s character than any of the others….. and my goodness, 18 months later and I was at Parris Island becoming a Marine….

… how the time does fly….

… anyway, I seem to have wandered a bit and lost my thought-train….. oh yeah, I remember…. Don’t bother watching “The Weatherman” or “The Avengers”….. even if you like Uma or Nicholas, just trust me…. both of those flicks are wretched…

by Eric on June 17, 2007 | Bullshit (9) | TrackBack (0) | Ummm, Ok....
Bullshit So Far

My favorite Nic Cage movie is still "Valley Girl"

Bullshitted by drc on June 17, 2007 04:32 PM

I seem to have done better than you in the movie department lately. Last night I woke up at some ungodly hour, could not get back to sleep and surfed the channels. What I came up with was a piece of fine acting from some years ago: In The Heat of the Night. Certainly one heck of a who dunnit, not one you would figure out easily with all the sidetracking as to the suspects. Also extremely well acted. I guess it is also ojne of the first big movies to breach the whole racial prejudice thing, not that I care one way or the other about it being such, but it sure was powerful in its depiction of racism in the south, and in some regards it portrayed racism from both sides of the fence.

Great movie, no big special effects, so it depended all on a good plot and excellent acting to turn out that way.

All the best,
Glenn B

Bullshitted by Glenn B on June 17, 2007 04:37 PM

The Avengers remake is sacrilegious to be sure...

and I am a fan of Miss Uma, even though she was married to that HUGE Douchebag Ethan Hawke.

Dangerous Liasons a good flick, but Henry and June better...

Bullshitted by armywifetoddlermom on June 17, 2007 04:45 PM

I love the old Avengers... the new one... sucks eggs. Would have warned you if I had known you were going to watch it.

Bullshitted by vw bug on June 17, 2007 06:33 PM

Dude, Uma! Yowza!

Bullshitted by Cappy on June 17, 2007 09:04 PM

I like Uma, but she's got balls to touch Dame Rigg's Mrs. Peel. It's just one of those roles that should never be reprised.

Bullshitted by rosie on June 18, 2007 10:47 AM

You were only 16 when you saw Dangerous Liasons? Good Grief. Some days you make me feel so old... Gah!

Bullshitted by Bou on June 18, 2007 02:50 PM

I couldn't asgree more - The Weatherman was a complete waste of time. ANd now I know to avoid The Avengers as well. Thanks for that!

Bullshitted by Richmond on June 18, 2007 03:45 PM

The Weatherman was rented, PPV, at my behest way back when. It sucked. We didn't finish it.

Give "John From Cincinnati" a look-see. Oddly bizarre, in a surfing movie kinda way.

Bullshitted by wil on June 18, 2007 07:45 PM