…. during a very curious incident last evening, my lamb chops combusted whilst being gently grilled on a medium heat…. It was quite shocking, really, with all the flames, smoke, and all…. and in spite of my newly-hairless right arm (from bravely pretending to be a firefighter), the chops were yummy, yummy, yummy…. hey, I even roasted potatoes!...

… the weird thing about singeing the hair off of one’s body parts is the sensory overload that you get during and after the event…. Initially, you get the heat/fright or flight-adrenalin rush thing/and overpowering stench of burnt hair…. And later?... you get to rub the crispy, curly, stubbly hairs that survived the fiery purge…. (they feel quite different from my normally luxuriantly furred arms.) …

…. So yeah… dinner last night rocked…. It’s just too bad that no one else was in the garage to witness me selflessly battling that raging fire to save my beloved chops…. Hell, were it not for the hairless right arm, The Missus would not have believed my tale of How I Saved Dinner either…

… but I know that you Rubberneckers believe me…. even though you can’t see my scorched arms or smell the hanging reek of seared hair in the garage… I just know that y’all believe me… and that is why we’re here…..

by Eric on February 12, 2007 | Bullshit (13) | TrackBack (0) | Ummm, Ok....
Bullshit So Far

"Eric the Hairless"

Well, I must admit - it has a bit of a ring to it... ;-)

Bullshitted by Richmond on February 12, 2007 06:30 PM

... it's just one arm though....

Bullshitted by Eric on February 12, 2007 06:33 PM

And there sat Eric looking cool and calm in the heart of the barbeque's roar and he wore a smile you could see a mile...Nope, sorry Eric, I just can't bring myself to write the cremation of the lamb chops. Rey B

Bullshitted by Rey B on February 12, 2007 06:49 PM

this isn't one of those fishing stories, is it?

Well, still sounds better than my crappy steak (too thin, too done, too much McCormicks), yellow squash (too much basil), corn on the cob (ok, that rocked) and boiled red potatoes.

Bullshitted by holder on February 12, 2007 07:07 PM

I singed my eyebrows and all the little hairs on my face when a gas furnace shot a fireball at me. I ran outside and dove face first into a snowdrift. The eyebrows were crunchy. Pretty funny now. Not so much back then.

Bullshitted by Jerry on February 12, 2007 07:19 PM

that CO2 from the fire extinguaisher is what gave them that taste..and maybe some of the burnt hair to give them that smoky flavor

Bullshitted by GUYK on February 12, 2007 07:52 PM

Dude. Clean the grill once in a while. The greasy drool of a hundred pounds of country style ribs past leads to conflagration.
Just sayin' is all......

Bullshitted by bitterman on February 12, 2007 08:19 PM

Dude... Eric The Red ain't supposed to be about your blisters.

Bullshitted by That 1 Guy on February 12, 2007 09:18 PM

When I was a little girl, if you held a blow dryer to a Barbie's hair, it crinkled all up and melted. Is your arm like that, Barbie blow dryer hair?

Bullshitted by Bou on February 12, 2007 10:25 PM

damn... not a lot of sympathy for ya here... poor Eric.

Bullshitted by Jean on February 12, 2007 10:49 PM

Damn, one armed Eric, defender of the chops, might be a novelette in there somewhere, be glad Vman has thrown in the towel it would have been ugly...

Bullshitted by James Old Guy on February 13, 2007 07:07 AM

And you ARE familiar with the conept of tallow and oil lamps, no?

Sheep tallow is some of the best for lighting for the clarity of the flame, low smoke at lamp oil temps and ability to be burned at lower temperatures...

Bullshitted by wil on February 17, 2007 06:39 PM

concept, even. Where are my glasses?

Bullshitted by wil on February 17, 2007 06:40 PM