Sally...

… there are moths and there are flames… and there are women and the movie “Sybil”…. I swear, I just don’t understand it….

… good God… I would rather repeatedly drive ten-penny nails – one after the other - into my forehead with the sole of a fucking Birkenstock than suffer through another viewing of “Sybil”…

… and yet it never, ever, ever fails…. if it is on, then it is watched…. and hey, I do try to flee… I run… I blog… I try to steady my nerves with outside chores or kitchen dish-work…. but the primal, weaning screams of Sally Fields cannot be squelched by mere walls of brick, mortar, sheetrock, the running of tap water, or paint…. no, no, gentle reader…. her nasally whine can penetrate any barrier…. ANY barrier…. and it reverberates through my brainpan each time she squeals and lapses into yet another of her sixteen fictional personalities… it echoes in my head…. reverberating like the sound of a gang of violent midgets busily sawing through the back of my skull with dull hacksaws… and all the while singing “American Pie” at the top of their little lungs …

…. and why that goddamn movie is FOUR hours LONG is a total fucking mystery… hell, after two hours I was personally rooting for her boyfriend to wing the crazy bitch off the top of that housing block and be done with it….and that is mild, people… after only twenty minutes of attempting to hide from the dialogue, I was ready to sneak into the nearest closet and drain a vein with my Cold Steel…..

… and on top of everything else, and in a vain attempt to maintain my sanity, I looked her up on Wikipedia while the flick blared in the background…. and guess what?... most of the movie is fictionalized!... Sally Fields should be dragged off and shot…

by Eric on October 24, 2006 | Bullshit (12) | TrackBack (0) | Psycho Rants
Bullshit So Far

So, Eric...don't hold back. Tell us what you really think...

Bullshitted by Elisson on October 25, 2006 05:00 AM

I've never seen it. Ever. Not even one minute of it. I don't think I've ever seen it on TV up here. Maybe you should move to Canada.

Bullshitted by Lisa W. on October 25, 2006 05:27 AM

I've never seen it either. Makes me glad I don't watch TV...

Bullshitted by Bou on October 25, 2006 05:38 AM

OFF switch,, very handy...wish women had one

Bullshitted by james old guy on October 25, 2006 07:06 AM

Never seen it, never even heard of it - you should move back to Scotland!

Bullshitted by mark on October 25, 2006 07:19 AM

Sally Fields..ain't she the flyin' nun who got fun poked at her by Bert Reynolds?

Bullshitted by GUYK on October 25, 2006 08:55 AM

Eric -

I know what you're saying. Like the weakminded among us would say... I feel yore pain. I once dated a lady who believed all that Multiple Personality Syndrome crap and could watch that movie over and over. There were times when I was driven from my home because of that damned movie.

Fortunately, the lady had the redeeming feature of being in possession of an educated snapper... that made it possible for her to drive me crazy without making me homicidal.

All I had to do was use my wicked tongue in that certain way, and appreciate the fact that the girl could simulate being a dozen different women, and I soon became a devotee of bogus junk psychology too. If I was good, I could make her shift-change through her entire repertoire and have the girl bark like a dog before she got to the end of Sybil.

What crap.

Bob

Bullshitted by Bob Baird on October 25, 2006 01:19 PM

I remember seeing it... oh many many years ago. (when the hell was it made anyway?) It was on television and they blathered on about how great it was... I watched it, was totally unimpressed, and have now forgotten everything about it except that Sally was supposed to have an extra personality or two hanging around.

As I remember I found the whole exercise of watching it, dreadfully depressing. And at the end I thought... well... so what?

I would not willingly watch it again.

Bullshitted by Teresa on October 25, 2006 02:27 PM

Good God. Sounds awful! Never seen it, never plan to. Ugh...

Bullshitted by Richmond on October 25, 2006 03:21 PM

Sybil, doesn't that always come out around Halloween every year? Just like The Ten Commandments at Easter and It's A Wonderful Life at Christmas?

Bullshitted by Lemon Stand on October 25, 2006 03:28 PM

It's "graced" my screen 'fore.

Remote broke bother? I'll send you some batt'ry's.

Bullshitted by RedNeck on October 25, 2006 08:51 PM

Just for you, Buddy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iu60twC9qJU

Bullshitted by Jerry on November 11, 2006 12:34 AM