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Thanks man...these folks need some serious help.

I'm downtown with it.

I'm doing my part.

Hell raised by Yabu on August 31, 2005 12:52 PM

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We are all pitching in what we can but man oh man! Can the city ever be rebuilt and if it can-can it be rebuilt to with stand this kind of storm in the future? I also fell in love with the city years ago although I am not near as familiar with it as you. However, I fear that it is lost and may never be rebuilt. Too much damage and probably not enough insurance money nor financing available.

Hell raised by GUYK on August 31, 2005 03:53 PM

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... good point, Guy.. but, damn, I can't imagine a world without a New Orleans..

Hell raised by Eric on August 31, 2005 04:43 PM

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I really regret putting off a visit to New Orleans.

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 31, 2005 06:50 PM

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New Orleans, Biloxi, Mobile.......it's just overwhelming.

But I have a very special spot in my heart for New Orleans - one of my happiest memories in life came from a visit there.

My heart just breaks for all of them.

Hell raised by Tammi on September 1, 2005 07:36 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Hmmm.. you might think he's conservative, but really he's a Euro loving, EU-phile in Conservative clothing. He's just denounced his wish to take the UK into the Euro, 'cause he knows that wouldn't wash with the Tory faithful.

I'll grant that he IS entertaining (who doesn't love a whisky drinking smoker?) and he's not as much a traitor to the Tory cause as is Michael Heseltine.

Hell raised by Vol abroad on August 31, 2005 08:52 AM

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"who doesn't love a whisky drinking smoker?"... indeed... there is hope for me yet...

Hell raised by Eric on August 31, 2005 08:59 AM

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Exactly. That's what I tell myself and all the people who love me (or should).

Hell raised by Vol abroad on September 1, 2005 06:31 AM

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Too late I fear, poor old Ken'll be 70 by the time of the next election. The Tories were mad not to put him in charge when they elected baby faced Hague.

Hell raised by Dave on September 1, 2005 02:23 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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I had to start over about half way through when I realized you were talking about a pool table! LOL I'm such a ditz sometimes.

Hell raised by livey on August 30, 2005 12:40 PM

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Ugh. Spider wars. ::shudder::

Hell raised by Richmond on August 30, 2005 03:41 PM

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Spider Wars?

"Luke... I am your tarantula"

Hell raised by Harvey on August 30, 2005 05:36 PM

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Thanks, I had to turn every light in the house on and check for spiders.

My only ray of light is that I once watched a largish Praying Mantis dismember my suite mates not so large Tarantula. Maybe I should get a tattoo of a Carolina Mantis. That has to carry some MoJo.

Hell raised by Ironnerd on August 30, 2005 11:31 PM

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I'm beginning to think you have far too many spiders in that house...

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 31, 2005 11:28 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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there's nothing like a sunrise over the mountains.

Hell raised by justrose on August 30, 2005 08:42 AM

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'Tis true, Bro.

When I can't find the grace, or see the beauty, I'm done riding... or dead.

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 30, 2005 06:51 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Pork chop ruination...

I thought better of you.

; )

I hope your uncle's family doesn't have a bad time of it.

Hell raised by Christina on August 29, 2005 04:01 PM

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I saw a video today where Miss'ippi's governor Haley Barbour said looters will be dealt with "ruthlessly." I'm hoping that means, shot on sight. That's one thing that burns my ass. It's bad enough for mother nature to ruin all your stuff, but when people take advantage of their fellow man's bad fortune, they deserve to be shot (or worse).

Hell raised by Dash on August 29, 2005 05:17 PM

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I hope all your relatives and friends are OK man, but hey, you did the right thing greasin' that pork chop man, if they can't eat good, why should you? ;)

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 29, 2005 06:28 PM

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Hope your Uncle and family are okay! *shakes head over pork chop* Looters, shoot on sight...

Hell raised by Laughing Wolf on August 29, 2005 07:11 PM

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I hold my meat too.

Hell raised by Cappy on August 29, 2005 07:56 PM

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Eric - you didn't ruin the pork chop. The baking rays in your oven were off. Trust me - I deal with that all the time. ;-)

Hell raised by Tammi on August 29, 2005 08:05 PM

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Thats the secret to great cooking. Make them wait so damn long for the food the sole of a boot would taste good ;)

Hell raised by Azygos on August 29, 2005 10:09 PM

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*** shaking head ****

I don't get it. I could only watch about 10 minutes at a time - then I'd just get sick of them repeating the same old same old. I'd go away and come back a couple hours later. Even then I felt like I was being sucked into a news machine that just kept repeating itself over and over and over...

And you sacrificed a perfectly good pork chop for them... you're a better man than I am Gunga Din. *grin* I just couldn't devote the mental effort to it.

I hope your family is all okay. Oh yeah, I agree - shoot all looters!

Hell raised by Teresa on August 30, 2005 12:55 AM

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Well...I forgive you for ruining a pork chop..it really wasn't your fault sugar!

Hell raised by Sandy on August 30, 2005 08:14 AM

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I got a mashed potato recipe that'll make you whimper like a pooch just done with his girlfriend-- but you gotta ask nice.

Hell raised by wavemaker on August 31, 2005 09:08 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Burn'em at the stake!!!
I'll light the match.

Hell raised by phin on August 29, 2005 01:29 PM

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Hot tar and feathers at the very least, but am inclined to want to go the draw and quarter route with them. If they did spam, hope they get the book thrown at them and good riddance!

Hell raised by Laughing Wolf on August 29, 2005 01:38 PM

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Wonderful, terrific news indeed!

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 29, 2005 02:10 PM

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Hey, they got the authors of Zotob and Mytob today too man!

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 29, 2005 06:29 PM

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We should take up a collection to pay several of the other prisoners walk by and slap them in the head every day, at different times a day. Be takin a bite of food and whap! right in the back of the head.

Hell raised by Bane on August 29, 2005 07:16 PM

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I say public lynching!

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 29, 2005 07:19 PM

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I say pubic lynching! Probly hurts worse.

Hell raised by Bane on August 29, 2005 08:34 PM

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While they rot in prison, they can only eat cans of SPAM for the rest of their unnatural lives...

Hell raised by WitNit on August 30, 2005 10:33 PM

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...and be forced to listen to Monty Python's Spam skit over and over and over and over....

Hell raised by WitNit on August 30, 2005 10:33 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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You got that right. I'd get the hell out if I was down there. That Kat's a big un. And since NO is already below sea level, there aint nothin' good to be had by stickin' 'round to see what happens. I'm sure you're aware, they don't "bury" people in New Orleans. Their grave yards are above ground. Man, there's gonna be all kinds of stuff floatin' 'round there 'fore too long I'm afraid.

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 28, 2005 12:36 PM

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As a 10 year resident of the Crescent City, I can promise you that "nightmare" does not even come close to what is about to transpire.....

It's gonna be bad, dude. Like biblical, fire and brimstone, hellfire from above kinda bad. The folks that cant leave (ie your poor, indigent, old, infirmed, etc) are basically dead where ever they stand. The gators and snakes from Barataria, the Rigolets, Bonne Carierre will own the city for weeks.

Then again, this bastard could take a 4 or 5 degree jog to the west before landfall or bleed off some windspeed and all would be well. But if it stays Cat 5?........Good bye N.O.

Hell raised by bitterman on August 28, 2005 01:50 PM

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I'm sick. And if it gets with the NE quadrant it's even worse. If that's possible.

Hell raised by Tammi on August 28, 2005 02:35 PM

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Bitterman doesn't even mention the vast cesspool it's going to become, full of toxic waste from the nearby chemical plants that drain into it. Sewage, chemicals, dead bodies... we should be equally afraid of the days and months following.

Biblical proportions is right.

Hell raised by Bou on August 28, 2005 03:03 PM

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I go on record for the first time, publicly, as afraid. Very afraid, in fact, for the fate of my kindred souls in NOLA.

Hell raised by Velociman on August 28, 2005 07:54 PM

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some reports are saying that if NO escapes with 10,000 dead they will be considered fortunate. I am hoping for the best but expecting the worst. A 25 to 28 foot storm surge will take a big portion of NO back out to sea with it and leave a 6 foot deep lake where NO used to be with the dome, if its still there in the middle of it. DAMN

Hell raised by GUYK on August 28, 2005 08:56 PM

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Scary shit indeed. One would think they would have protected the city a bit better, since it's such an attractive atmosphere. Maybe they'll get lucky....

Hell raised by sadie on August 28, 2005 09:09 PM

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I don't agree with people staying there and risking their lives. But, alot of folks have no way to leave, so, they are either surfing, partying or holed up in the 'dome.' What do you do? Coastal places and people of these areas don't like to leave....they think they can survive anything, and if not, so be it. One wonders what will happen to all the critters? I bet alot of them fled 3 days ago, or tried to. Animals listen to their instincts...too bad the human animal forgot how to do that...until its too late.

I'm in South Texas and we were already seeing changes in the weather patterns this morning.

Hell raised by Sinequanon on August 29, 2005 12:13 AM

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Well.......I have to say it:

1) And, they say there is no global warming?

2) Oil is already up tp 80 bucks a barrel because of Katrina. Greedy bastards.

3) I suspect there will be alot of repercussions we can not even fathom....none of which will be good. And if this is biblical or mother nature, all I can say is: payback is hell.

Hell raised by Sinequanon on August 29, 2005 12:17 AM

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Sinequanon - This has nothing to do with Global warming and everything to do with the natural weather patterns of the earth.

About 5-10 years ago almost all Hurricanes would hit the Carolinas, the weather pattern has is every changing and follows a certain path, for now Florida and the Gulf are getting everything, soon it will be back to a few a year and hitting the Carolina's.

Every state has noticed weather patterns. They are kind of like El Nino, weather has a predictable pattern and the pattern we are in has lots of hurricanes in Florida and the Gulf right now.

It's normal.

Hell raised by Machelle on August 29, 2005 08:29 AM

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I hope that this thing turns out ok. I haven't ever even been to New Orleans...I so want to go. Ever since I started reading the Vampire Chronicles...

Talk about global warming makes me laugh. Haven't we been experiencing that phenonmena since..say the end of the ice age? Something had to make the ice melt.

Hell raised by Kelly on August 29, 2005 09:09 AM

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It's a 20 year cycle. We're in the midst of it. Unfortunately, people forget during the 20 years we're 'off' and they move to the coast.

Hell raised by Bou on August 29, 2005 10:12 AM

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Machelle-This has nothing to do with Global warming and everything to do with the natural weather patterns of the earth.

Yes there are natural weather patterns of the Earth. But, global warming and development, the human touch, has aggravated those weather patterns into stronger and stronger storms. We aren't seeing more storms, just ones that are much much worse and more intense. Part of this is due to the warming of the Earth and the oceans. I can provide evidence if you need it. And, I do have a background in this area should that make a difference.

Kelly, I have NO words.

Bou - I hate to tell you this, but these are close to being 1,000 year storms. When there are Tsunami occurring at the level we are seeing, that is not the normal course of weather. El Nino , Nina, are forewarnings of the phenomena and they are telling us something - like the waters of the earth are warming and the polar ice caps are melting - I've seen it and it is a very scary sight.

Hell raised by Sinequanonblog on August 30, 2005 11:40 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Is it a coincidence that I sent you some snakes yesterday? hmmmmmmm woo-woo?

Hell raised by Indigo on August 28, 2005 11:05 AM

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Found some stuff on iTunes...check your email and let me know if you want a copy. I mean, of course, if you want me to tell you where you can purchase your own legitimate copy. (Thank you, RIAA bastards.)

Hell raised by zonker on August 28, 2005 11:22 AM

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Damn Zonker,
Not that I wanted Eric's first born, I think he's gonna deserver that one, but I was tryin' to contribute here, and then you go and buy the damned song. You suck. ;)

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 28, 2005 11:27 AM

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... I love you people... I really, really do...

Hell raised by Eric on August 28, 2005 11:30 AM

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Hawkshaw was a big time original Opry star, like from it's inception. His actual first name was Harold. He was most famous for being killed with Patsy Cline and Cowboy Copas in a plane crash in 1963. His big hit was called "Lonesome 7-7203" which is actually one of my favorite classic country songs.

And that is all I know about Hawkshaw.

Hell raised by bitterman on August 28, 2005 12:07 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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This is bullshit. I'm a big guy, my doctor used to tell me to lose weight all the time, Now that I'm actually losing weight he just encourages me. I'm not going to sue him for pointing out I'm a big fat bastard!

Hell raised by Contagion on August 27, 2005 10:32 AM

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Here's the frickin' kicker, he's her DOCTOR. It is his responsibility to tell her. She's probably the type that if she had a heart attack due to her weight, and he never said anything, she'd sue him for NOT telling her.

I hope she loses this, loses this big, and not one dime comes out of his pocket. I hope she has to pay all legal fees and court costs. And maybe the Judge can fine her for being a dumb ass.

What a damn idiot. I was so pissed when I read that a couple days it ago, I couldn't see straight.

Hell raised by Bou on August 27, 2005 10:59 AM

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He told her she was obese... not a freakin' mutated elephant or anything like that. Even then... suit is a stupid thing.

My favorite doctor once told me to find another doc... if I wasn't going to what he suggested, fine. But I was not going to die as one of his patients. I personally liked that.

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 27, 2005 11:32 AM

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Hey lady, ya want fries with that law suit?

Hell raised by Bullseye on August 27, 2005 11:42 AM

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The biggest tragedy here is that she's ALLOWED to sue for something like this! What a waste of time & money.

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 27, 2005 12:15 PM

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and we wonder why medical costs are so costly. Maybe open season on tort lawyers about once a year with just enough bounty to pay for the ammo would thin them out some. And to think I once wanted to be a lawyer. I'm glad now they found out my parents were legally maried to each other and turned me down.

Hell raised by GUYK on August 27, 2005 01:19 PM

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I heard that on the radio the other day, and I just laughed. That suit, in my unoffical legal opion, stands about the same chance that a snowball in hell does. If she don't melt somewhere along the way, and show's up in court lookin' like a cow, what jury/judge 'ceptin' maybe a blind one can't figure out that she got pissed and decided to try pissin' up a rope?

Man, I don't hardly go to doctors. Not 'cause I've got anything against 'em, but they cost too much for me, and ditto on dentits. My kids, different story. But when did callin' a spade a spade become a crime?

I heard he said obese, and not fat, but I wasn't there so I don't know, but either way, we're talkin' politically correct mincin' of words here. Fat is fat. I ain't skinny, I ain't what I'd call fat, but I'm sure there's some skinny folk that describe me that way.

But to sue him over that? It's just wrong.

I think she needs a belly ring, like a Larry the cable guy belly ring, so they can pull her away from the buffet e'ry now and then.

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 27, 2005 03:35 PM

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It's a sad fact that the US has more law suites per person than any other country in the world. People will sue for anything, coffee too hot, doctor to blunt. People should learn that the truth hurts, but it's sometimes necessary. You're right in everything you say. She would have probably sued if he didn't tell her to lose weigth!

Hell raised by Junebugg on August 27, 2005 05:45 PM

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People people people -- just to correct a misunderstanding, she DIDN'T SUE the doctor (there is no civil tort for "hurting one's feelings," thank the lawd), she filed a complaint against him with the Board of Registration of Medicine -- i.e., she accused him of inappropriate practice.

The question is, will he be reprimanded for telling her the truth. I think not, and while it was the height of idiocy for her to file a complaint, once she does, the Board is required to undertake an "investigation," which could simply be a phone call to the doctor to ask him "what's up with this lady?"

This is a great story, but I think there may be more "story" to it than fact. This guy won't face any discipline at all, is my bet.

Hell raised by wavemaker on August 28, 2005 09:00 AM

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I suspect this is another anomolly. There are alot of people in the world who don't want to face the truth, about themselves or the world we live in today.

These are the cases that make people with legitimate lawsuits suffer.

Hell raised by Sinequanon on August 29, 2005 12:22 AM

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Does this dress make my ass look fat?

Be careful how you answer that question. Truth ain't what the woman is looking for.

Hell raised by Acidman on August 29, 2005 10:35 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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okey dokey. Hmmmm....gotta do a special email (wink wink) and a meme. Got it. It'll be up tomorrow!!!

Hell raised by Tammi on August 26, 2005 07:55 PM

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When I read that she had tagged you this morning I wondered what your answers would be. I wonder no more..... Good meme....
:)

Hell raised by Richmond on August 26, 2005 09:12 PM

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I had a good friend I worked with one time get his head blown off by his step dad. Kid was like 20, maybe. We co-workers were in the chapel, keepin it real, looking at him lying there in a suit he would never wear were he alive, and the first Hammond B3 power notes of 'Blue Collar Man' by Styx came blamming out of the chapels speakers...

Man, that leveled us. I still can't listen to that song.

Hell raised by Bane on August 26, 2005 10:15 PM

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Step Right Up... funny, but a friend and I were just talkin' about Waits on Thursday, and this song was one that we brought up. I told him about you singing right along with it.

You're right... Waits kinda grows on you.

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 27, 2005 06:35 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Verrrry cool story.

I love exploring ancient graveyards.

When you were in Scotland did you go through them? Absolutely amazing places.

Hell raised by blondage on August 26, 2005 12:36 PM

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I love old graveyards. I went a searchin' with my Dad once up in Troy, AL... lookin' for old dead kin. I need to do that again.

Hell raised by Bou on August 26, 2005 03:48 PM

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I found some papers at Auburn of a James Henry Lane, General CSA. But I don't think that is who you found. Link follows:
http://www.lib.auburn.edu/archive/find-aid/501.htm

Hell raised by The Maximum Leader on August 26, 2005 08:42 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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*sigh* Boys..... Sounds like it's time for your wife to return before you get into *real* trouble. ;)

Hell raised by Richmond on August 25, 2005 01:05 PM

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My old rock & roll band still does a reggae version of "Dixie." It brings the house down every time.

You oughta hear it.

Hell raised by Acidman on August 25, 2005 02:03 PM

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what is wit you boys, cant dance to da Wailers? I tink you boys need a little smoke da next time.

disclaimer------
*best Jamacin accent I could pull off in a pinch, I would also never advocate the use of illegal substances*

Hell raised by ArmyWifeToddlerMom on August 25, 2005 02:24 PM

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"have you ever seen three full-grown whiteboys attempting to dittybop to reggae?"

Having vacationed in Jamaica a couple times, the answer is, sadly, yes :-/

Hell raised by Harvey on August 25, 2005 05:22 PM

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Hey! I thought we were damned stylish. Of course I'd been drinking, so my perception may have been a little off. Survived another meeting of the "social Club". Thanks again for the hospitality, I had a blast.

Hell raised by Johnny - Oh on August 25, 2005 06:19 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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9 wives? What man in his right mind would want NINE wives? Holy crap. What a nutcase.

Hell raised by Bou on August 25, 2005 02:19 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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sump'in bout that boy, aint right.....

Hell raised by ArmyWifeToddlerMom on August 25, 2005 11:12 AM

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.. indeed...

Hell raised by Eric on August 25, 2005 11:21 AM

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Um. I guess there are all kinds of ways to give head?? huh.

Hell raised by Richmond on August 25, 2005 01:00 PM

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It takes a lot to shock me.

That shocked me.

Hell raised by blondage on August 25, 2005 02:17 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Glad to see you back up, but have to ask why you were home alone? The storm comment get you in that much trouble? :)

Hell raised by Laughing Wolf on August 24, 2005 02:54 PM

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Krispy Kreme Doughnuts. They send me spiralling into such a sugar high I think for sure one day I'll go into convulsions.

I truly try to stay away... you cannot eat just one. I need more substance in my doughnuts. KKs are seriously dangerous.

Hell raised by Bou on August 24, 2005 04:40 PM

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Krispy Kremes for dinner? With Martini's? Well, I guess you covered 2 of the 6 y chromosome food groups there... What's for dinner tonight?

Hell raised by Richmond on August 24, 2005 07:26 PM

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*doing my best Homer impersonation*

MmmmmMMMMMmmmmMMMmmm.....Krispy Kremes......

Hell raised by blondage on August 24, 2005 09:43 PM

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when the sign says hot, you gots ta stop...

i'm starting to think we're actually related

Hell raised by shoe on August 24, 2005 09:55 PM

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I am trying to contemplate why it is you don't weigh at least 400 pounds... There is something seriously unfair with a world where you can calmly consume vast amounts of sugar and fat... yet I just gained 20 pounds reading about it!!!

Hell raised by Teresa on August 24, 2005 11:27 PM

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Yeah, I'm with Teresa on this one! NOT fair!
My favorite Krispy Kreme are the glazed devil's food ones.
yuuuuummmmmmmm

Hell raised by Maeve on August 25, 2005 12:41 AM

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Oh, geeez...the raspberry-filled ones are the BEST, dude. And when they're warm...as Dax would say: just damn!

Hell raised by zonker on August 25, 2005 08:17 AM

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Krispy Kremes are good when they are hot and fresh. However, once they have cooled off I pretty much prefer most other major brand of doughnuts.

Hell raised by Contagion on August 25, 2005 09:15 AM

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Krispy Kremes are a poor man's make-do for when Dunkin' Donuts are unavailable.

*gets tied to a stake & stoned as a blasphemer*

Hell raised by Harvey on August 25, 2005 05:25 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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I knew you had it in you. It was the 5'4" sword that sold you wasn't it. ;)

You know you want one of those... Biker Steve would be in awe. I've read that he was a large man, and well educated. I reckon, just an ol' fashioned bad ass.

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 23, 2005 07:37 PM

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Sir William Wallace that is... No disrespect to Biker Steve.

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 23, 2005 07:40 PM

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The details of his execution are quite interesting. He did not go easy.

Hell raised by Acidman on August 25, 2005 04:11 AM

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Braveheart was a good movie.. horribly inaccurate historically.

Love the post, being a re-enactor that plays on his Scottish herritage I love talking Scottish history and that is one of my favorite of Burns' poems.

Hell raised by Contagion on August 25, 2005 09:21 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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a bittersweet denouement, but good times well remembered ... i think "high octane corn squeezings" is my new favorite phrase ...

Hell raised by justrose on August 23, 2005 11:32 AM

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justrose said it perfectly. bittersweet indeed, but it must have been such great fun while growing up.

Hell raised by Michele on August 24, 2005 11:26 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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I have a great ma-in-law, too - spoils me to the bitter end. But, you're right - none are perfect. That is a good post.

Hell raised by Dash on August 22, 2005 10:26 PM

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Whoa - I just logged a record number of hits on my blog. Thanks for the kind words. Who knew I would have spent my 15 minutes of fame this way? I could have been a noir movie starlet; so much for that, eh?

Your comment on my blog signed "Eric SWG" I could only determine to stand for "Star Wars Galaxies". Imagine the surprise when I found your well done page. I'm looking forward to reading more.

Cheers,
Carrie

Hell raised by Noir Muse on August 22, 2005 11:51 PM

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beautifully written ... mine is completely different from hers ... but special just the same. it makes me want to call her.

Hell raised by justrose on August 23, 2005 08:45 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Well, if your wife has Wolverine's blades you'll only have to worry about doing Storm maybe once. ;) Maybe.......

Hell raised by Richmond on August 22, 2005 10:22 AM

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indeed. but i got the same answer!

Hell raised by justrose on August 22, 2005 10:46 AM

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LOL! Definitely n.o.t. the thing to say.

Hell raised by vw bug on August 22, 2005 12:05 PM

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Um, yeah...no.
That response is reserved for non-SO type ears.

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 22, 2005 12:45 PM

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*nudging you with my elbow hard enough to cause grimacing*

*headed off to the hardware store to buy you a rope, you can use that the next time you feel like hanging yourself"

Or Dear Wife can use the rope in whatever fashion she would like.....

Hell raised by ArmyWifeToddlerMom on August 22, 2005 03:21 PM

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Hahaha! Hey man... that thing can happen vice versa, too... :-) Rube hasn't blogged about yesterday yet... but... in our case, it was Edward Scissorhands...

Hell raised by Ann on August 22, 2005 03:27 PM

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Oh yeah, that's not the answer I would have given. Mine would have been 'whoever is doing the nasty with Wolverine on a nightly basis'... man, Hugh Jackman is a hotty. I don't think his response would have been quite the same as your lovely wife's. ;-)

Hell raised by Bou on August 22, 2005 03:46 PM

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You keep that up, and you are going to be known as Chester instead of Festus. Imagine you will get little sympathy on the limp...

Hell raised by Laughing Wolf on August 22, 2005 03:47 PM

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ROFLMFAO!!
Dude, you are lucky you still have all your digits to type your blog.
Hell, you're lucky not to be maimed in some sort of fashion at all!

Hell raised by Maeve on August 22, 2005 04:57 PM

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Damn you just blew my image of you as the always sweet, loving, clever husband!

Hell raised by livey on August 22, 2005 07:31 PM

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one word; MONSTER'S BALL!
BillyBobThornton is a damn lucky S.O.B.

Hell raised by Marcus on August 22, 2005 08:51 PM

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You were correctly wrong...

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 23, 2005 03:50 AM

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Ouch. Are yous till sleeping on the couch?

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 23, 2005 05:53 AM

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Heck, "Which mutant would you be?"... I thought, just for a second, I was gonna read "Velociman's Mutant of course, he gets away with anything"...

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 23, 2005 07:40 AM

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Better learn to sleep with one eye open!

Hell raised by Alaska Kim on August 23, 2005 05:30 PM

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DOH!

Hell raised by blondage on August 24, 2005 09:53 PM

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Man, I felt the chill all the way over here!

Hell raised by Michele on August 24, 2005 11:36 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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good lord! i've never seen the word "scrotum" in the plural. why would there be any need for it? i don't usually discuss them as a collective concept ...

what a review ....LOL

Hell raised by justrose on August 21, 2005 10:51 AM

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Haw!! And the review is in a website called "Coming Soon"!!

Hell raised by Joe P. on August 21, 2005 12:37 PM

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The real interesing question is how did you come upon such a review? Are you on some kind of Mammalian Genetalia Mailing List?

By the way, I wonder if the plural of scrotum is scrota, but I'm too lazy to look, and I don't expect to be needing the word any time soon, anyway.

Hell raised by Jim - PRS on August 21, 2005 06:07 PM

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Well, Eric, I don't know about you, but I was slightly disappointed that we never received the answer concerning the marmaset.

What the hell are we supposed to do if we ever find a marmaset in need? Let's be charitable, people.

Hell raised by sadie on August 21, 2005 07:34 PM

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Jim, or scroti. A whole mess of them would not be a herd or a litter, but possibly a gaggle? A great gaggle of scrotums.

But what the hell do I know, scrotums ain't my bag. Not genetically, anyway.

Hell raised by Anna on August 22, 2005 02:52 AM

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LOL! I needed to see this. Maybe it has something to do with having 2 boys, a male dog, a male pony and a husband. ;-)

Hell raised by vw bug on August 22, 2005 07:52 AM

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My FIRST thought was that of Jim's. How in the hell did you find this? Did you stumble on it or think, 'blog fodder. I need blog fodder. I know. I'll google raccoon scrotum and see what I get." ;-)

Hell raised by Boudicca on August 22, 2005 08:04 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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No snakes, were there?

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 20, 2005 08:41 PM

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.. nope.. not this time...

Hell raised by Eric on August 21, 2005 08:21 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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That was cool! I was a big 'ol copycat.

Hell raised by Kelly on August 20, 2005 10:30 AM

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Ok, I did my duty and signed up...and no pressure..but don't you EVEN think of dying and leaving me that thankless job.

Hell raised by Kelly on August 20, 2005 04:02 PM

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Hey I thought I'd be nice and moved you up! You are now 3,029! Want me to elimate some people?

Hell raised by livey on August 20, 2005 07:29 PM

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WHAT? I can't believe you got moved up before me. Then again, I'm too lazy to move myself up any further. ;-)

Guess you have to be eliminated first. Phew.

Hell raised by VW Bug on August 21, 2005 08:33 PM

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Can I sign up to be a minion or a flunkie or something?

Hell raised by Harvey on August 23, 2005 06:54 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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I'm sure you do fine when you dance. I think, if you look around at all the folks who do dance, it's just a sea of flailing arms, heaving thighs and wagging bossoms. But you are so right in your assessment that watching the action is so much more fun.

Hell raised by Moogie on August 20, 2005 09:23 AM

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Suit yourself... I'll jump on the chance to shake my booty any day!

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 20, 2005 11:43 AM

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I prefer to slow dance with some one.
I also love doing the swing dance too!

Hell raised by Maeve on August 20, 2005 02:30 PM

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You mean to tell me...

"but just shaking my hips in wild abandon?.. it just ain't gonna happen..."

and all of this from the State of Graceland? Damn son, you ain't lookin' to make a bit of money are ya? Hell, there's GOT to be some Elvis in ol' Eric somewhere. Your names both start with E. I think you're just missin' a letter man. Change you name to Elric.
;) It'll come to you then for sure.

On the other hand, maybe you're just tryin' to get on ol' Ed Sullivan's show, without bein' cut off at the waist.

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 20, 2005 02:35 PM

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I don't like dancing. Two stepping is cool. Slow dancing is cool. Unfortunately, I have this tendancy to lead. Big surprise. So I just stay away.

Hell raised by Bou on August 20, 2005 06:15 PM

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i get it, i do ... i go back and forth, dancing through life then sitting back and sipping drinks ... this just happens to be a dancy period ... and if you know a whirly scottish dance or two, that's more than i do ...

you're not allowed to take a drink on this dance floor, they want to guard against spilling, so ... i guess you just have to finish it, go dance a few songs, then get another! ;)

Hell raised by justrose on August 21, 2005 10:48 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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« Shut the hell up!

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I like chocolate covered ants a lot, but I've only been able to find them in a Chinatown, and we don't have any around here. I'll have to start Googling (with Yahoo, Google are libtard pukes).

I had grasshoppers, once. Didn't like em. Crunchy chocolate boogers.

The blueberries are awesome, though.

Hell raised by Bane on August 19, 2005 06:07 PM

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i will eat chocolate on or as anything (i even saw chocolate pasta at one place, but what sauce would you have it with? chocolate syrup?), but my favorite chocolate-covered items are gummy bears and pretzels. in fact i ate a rather large quantity of chocolate covered pretzels today, and i might have to eat some more since the bag isn't empty yet. you never know what you'll find in aisle 12!

Hell raised by justrose on August 19, 2005 07:23 PM

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"everything is better when dipped in chocolate"... oh.yes.it.is. ;-)

Hell raised by Bou on August 19, 2005 08:18 PM

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Well, Ms Bou, I just dropped something off at the pool which begs to differ with you.

Hell raised by Bane on August 19, 2005 10:14 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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I still like the original "Night of the Living Dead." Shows you MY taste in movies...

Hell raised by Acidman on August 19, 2005 10:31 AM

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One of my personal faves was the 1973 "Werewolf of Washington" with Dean Stockwell as the President's Press Secretarty who goes all wolfie. It is a fun metaphor for the collapse of the Nixon administration. Ya gotta see it to believe it!
This web link has all the details you'll need:
http://www.jabootu.com/acolytes/bnotes/wwow.htm

As Michael Weldon says in the Pyschotronic Encyclopedia - "Michael Dunn (Wild Wild West) plays Dr. Kiss, who uses a secret door in a White House men's room to enter a hidden lab and make monsters".

Hell raised by Joe P. on August 19, 2005 11:19 AM

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Let's not forget "Teen Wolf," possibly a career low point for Michael J. Fox.

Hell raised by Elisson on August 19, 2005 04:41 PM

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Hey, I was there man, I remember the werewolf of woodstock,,,freaked me out!!

Hell raised by Michele on August 19, 2005 04:57 PM

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My tops would have to be 'The Howling'. That movie knocked me back in my seat in the theatre. And each sequel managed to top its previous for pure awfulness. I mean, Were-marsupials?

Hell raised by Bane on August 19, 2005 06:03 PM

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This makes me want to get my best of Warren Zevon album out...."I saw a werewolf drinking a pina colada at Trader Vic's
His hair was perfect."

Hell raised by trouble on August 24, 2005 02:52 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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If it's the Aberlour that's working on you, it better damn well be the a'bunadh, and not the 10 year old.

I use the 10 year old as my "every day" Scotch.

The a'bunadh is a special occasion drink, the only one made now that's even *close* to the best single malt ever made, the 12 year old 100 proof Springbank that was a blend of a young vintage with a *very old* batch that didn't quite have what it took to be good.

I have two bottles of that Scotch left, both reserved for very special occasions.

I may very well die with neither of those bottles consumed.

Hell raised by Jack on August 18, 2005 06:05 PM

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... nope... it's the 10 year old... hey, I'm unemployed... heh heh...

Hell raised by Eric on August 18, 2005 06:11 PM

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Wow. Scotch and art! Deep stuff goin' on at your place. :) Do we get to see pictures of the finished patio though?

Hell raised by Richmond on August 18, 2005 06:12 PM

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I love Roger Miller mixed with a little Tom T. Hall.

Hell raised by drc on August 18, 2005 06:25 PM

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Whack-a-do whack-a-do whack-a-do

Hell raised by Cappy on August 18, 2005 07:46 PM

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Roger Miller was one of the best "scat" singers who ever lived. He also was very good at "effin'" if you know what that is.

His songs are full of that stuff. Doop-doop-de-waddly-dop-doo!

Hell raised by Acidman on August 18, 2005 08:05 PM

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I always wondered what he meant by "the rosy red cheeks of the little children". Always loved Roger. Never trusted him.

Hell raised by Velociman on August 18, 2005 09:56 PM

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"Roses are red and violets are purple
Sugar is sweet and so's maple surple."

Beauty.

Hell raised by Jim - PRS on August 18, 2005 10:12 PM

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I'm working on the 4th generation now, making another fan club for Roger Miller. My little 4-yr old GGS simply LOVES "I Ain't Coming Home Tonight" and "You Got To Again."

Hell raised by Indigo on August 19, 2005 11:31 AM

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I've always marveled that the same guy who turned out single after single of stuff like "Buffalo Herd", could then turn around and come up with "HUsbands and Wives"

Hell raised by Bithead on August 27, 2005 05:51 PM

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I Linked this piece for Sun Sep 11
Thank You

Hell raised by GrampaPinhead on September 11, 2005 01:34 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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yeah, great post..you turned me into a blackfive fan a long time ago..i do appreciate it..

Hell raised by shoe on August 17, 2005 05:57 PM

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I'll never be able to hear that song without getting a bit misty ever again.

Hell raised by chris on August 17, 2005 07:14 PM

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Thanks, Eric. You remind me of Cooter in more than a few ways.

Which, now that I think about it, is probably why I sided with (the lovely) Mrs. SWG at 3am at your table the night we killed the Glenfarclas, the Talisker and the moonshine, and got annihilated by Biker Steve on the pool table.

Hell raised by Blackfive on August 17, 2005 10:07 PM

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I agree, I love that song. I can feel Matt's loss. And I'm glad you pointed me his direction. I think I found you from readin' B5.

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 17, 2005 10:09 PM

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Good song, good choice, my fav,,,

Hell raised by Michele on August 18, 2005 08:58 AM

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Yeah, Blackfive and Skynyrd...sigh.

Hell raised by WitNit on August 18, 2005 11:54 AM

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Oh how I love that song....

Hell raised by blondage on August 18, 2005 05:20 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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I just *hate* when that happens. When I walk into a room and have to stop and say "oh crap, now why am I here again?"

Anyway, I'll look forward to hearing the rest of the story later. :-) Happy pool shooting!

Hell raised by Richmond on August 17, 2005 06:07 PM

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eric - i just scored a jar of branston when i went to atlantic city -- in some little country emporium dedicated to all things across the pond -- it was better than winning on the slots -- it's a rare thing indeed -- and one of my FAVORITE things -- it is cheddar's handmaiden and helpmate, and there is nothing like a good cheese ploughman's --

Hell raised by justrose on August 17, 2005 08:03 PM

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Better than Clausens?

Hell raised by Acidman on August 18, 2005 08:11 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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At least I showed up. Bee-yotch.

You gotta make the next one, dude. I'll bring some NoDoz and stay up with the grownups, too.

And just for the record, I knew that email wasn't *really* from you...there weren't enough ellipses...

Hell raised by zonker on August 17, 2005 08:49 AM

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It ain't easy being ME, either. No job... lots of money... man this is a burden. Some days, I don't know how I manage to carry it.

Hell raised by Acidman on August 17, 2005 10:03 AM

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I was right there with you until you said lots of money... not so much... but yeah, feel bad for us unemployed folk!

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 17, 2005 11:01 AM

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Yeah no job... lots of... bills...

Dammit, I think I'm not doing this right....

Oh yeah, and Mr. T is on the religious channels all the time. It's kind of creepy. I keep expecting some minister to slip him a micky so they can get him on a plane....

Hell raised by Graumagus on August 17, 2005 01:07 PM

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At least that Velicodude is still working, I don't even want to think of the writing that would come from a retired V man.

Hell raised by James Old Guy on August 17, 2005 02:57 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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hey thar, eric,
i jes writ ye a lil note in yer email inbox. ye fixin to have a grate time up in here. hope to meet yall when ye do!

take keer
buddy don

Hell raised by buddy don on August 16, 2005 08:17 PM

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NYC may never be the same.

All I keep thinking is, "Blog Fodder! Yeee Haa!"

Hell raised by Bou on August 16, 2005 11:03 PM

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Seeing as how you can't bring your shootin' iron or your blade, be sure to always carry a little "mugger money." They hate it when people say they have no money, and they have guns and knives.

Hell raised by Jim - PRS on August 16, 2005 11:38 PM

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You've never been to Manhattan? Wow. You'll have a good time. It's loads of fun.

Hell raised by zonker on August 17, 2005 07:43 AM

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My pistol's not welcome, I don't go. Period.

Hell raised by Bane on August 17, 2005 11:16 AM

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NY? Oh man, the food.......all that glorious, delicious fooooooooddddddd!!!!!!
We went in 93, had the time of my life. The food was awesome.

Hell raised by Maeve on August 17, 2005 07:00 PM

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NYC.... I have only one thing to say... TAXI!!!! Better than any roller coaster ride at 6 Flags. I have to look up the name of that Indian Vegitarian Restaurant I went to last time I was there. I was a bit leery - but it was fabulous. You do have to make reservations though.

Hell raised by Teresa on August 18, 2005 03:10 PM

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I can't believe what I'm reading here! You people have been watching to many crime dramas filmed in NYC. Let me give you a clue, TV is not reality!!!!

I've lived on my own in NYC since I was 16 and have never been mugged, held up or assaulted... and I do have a mouth on me that doesn't take crap from anyone.

To prepare for your visit just start getting off your butt and start walking, this is a small but extremely compact city. You can walk from end to end in one day. Prepare to have a great time and enjoy the sights. It's because of comments from Bou and others that I decided to start a companion site about New York City: http://nycpostcards.blogspot.com

You won't believe the comments I hear from visitors when I help them get oriented and ask them how they're enjoying there stay: "Gosh, people in NYC are so nice and friendly....",

Two things to note: 1) people here don't make eye contact because half the time they're in their head thinking about how to cram one more thing in their day. 2) People only say good morning to the people they work with or the people that live on the floor.

With 14 million people living, visiting, working in this vertical city every day, some things have to be dispensed with for the sake of sanity and logic.

You being ex-military you'll be fine in this city of mine. Your wits, charm and patience is all you need to bring with you. The rest you already have from your worlwide experience, street savy and hustle!

I'm really glad you're coming!

Hell raised by michele on August 18, 2005 10:19 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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"Disdained, alas..."

Good one!

Hell raised by zonker on August 16, 2005 07:46 AM

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Ridgerunners don't read poetry....;>)

Good stuff, chief.

Hell raised by bitterman on August 16, 2005 08:08 AM

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Great stuff. Now about my request for "Boil" and maybe some Houseman??? *G*

Hell raised by Laughing Wolf on August 16, 2005 03:34 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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I keep forgetting to pick up a book of his stuff. I think I'm going to search Amazon today!

Hell raised by zonker on August 15, 2005 10:34 AM

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Excellent.

"My Madonna" is still a favorite.

; )

Hell raised by Christina on August 15, 2005 10:56 AM

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I like "Victory Stuff" a lot.

Hell raised by Joan on August 15, 2005 11:09 AM

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Ahhh... well... since you ask. We were at dinner two nights ago when my eldest says to me, "Mom, what's a boil?" and what do you think popped into my head? Robert Service.

So, since it's been on my mind, 'Bessie's Boil'. ;-)

Hell raised by Bou on August 15, 2005 12:12 PM

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.. I hadn't read "Victory Stuff" in many moons.. good choice, Joan...

.. "My Madonna" is, of course, a favorite...

.. and trust you, Bou, to.. well, choose the Boil..

Hell raised by Eric on August 15, 2005 01:12 PM

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poetry! rock on! and has it been that long? i remember that post, when you read! i think it was one of the first of yours i ever read. tempus fugit.

Hell raised by justrose on August 15, 2005 02:08 PM

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Butt your readers will enjoy it so... Wait. Did I say Butt? ;-)

Hell raised by Bou on August 15, 2005 05:34 PM

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Thanks, Eric. I think you did a wonderful job on it. You read it kinda like Jimmy reads war poems...in that somber, knowing way that grabs hold of you and shakes you from the inside out.

Hell raised by Joan on August 15, 2005 06:05 PM

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Me? I just like the sound of your voice.

Hell raised by drc on August 16, 2005 10:23 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Sapphire too perfumey for me on the backside, but if that's what you're drinking, it's all good.

Hell raised by j.tonic on August 15, 2005 08:29 AM

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.. we're all about perfumey backsides here, Jim...

Hell raised by Eric on August 15, 2005 08:35 AM

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The last time I drank Gin, I robbed a liquor store.

That shit is Bad Bad Juju.

Hell raised by Yabu on August 15, 2005 11:14 AM

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All gin taste like pine tops

Hell raised by Catfish on August 15, 2005 04:32 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Key limes, dude. The size of Kong's balls. Won't be ready until November. But you can have your fill. May be able to harvest a few for your gig.

Hell raised by Velociman on August 14, 2005 05:54 PM

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.. that'd be perfect..

Hell raised by Eric on August 14, 2005 07:10 PM

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I cannot wait until he's got pineapples.

He loves him a pineapple.

Hell raised by sadie on August 14, 2005 08:05 PM

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My Uncle JW makes a fine muscadine wine. His vine is at least as old as I am and has always produced more than they could ferment, jelly, preserve, etc.

Check it: http://www.muscadine.com/muscadin.htm

http://www.newu.net/old_south_winery.html

Hell raised by bitterman on August 14, 2005 09:15 PM

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Priorities, priorities... libations before plain fruit anyday!

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 14, 2005 10:18 PM

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You're gonna need more than a trellis to support that grape-vine. Stick four fence-posts in the ground, run a piece of cyclone fence across the top and "train" the vine to climb that.

That bastard will take over in a couple of years and grow so thick that you can't see the posts or the wire anymore.

Trust me on this, Eric. I know a few things about farming.

Hell raised by Acidman on August 15, 2005 12:46 AM

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.. the trellis is against a dogwood tree... and two cedar posts rest against it creating a pyramid of sorts... I'm ready for the growth spurt..

Hell raised by Eric on August 15, 2005 08:21 AM

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wonderful news! i believe i remember the trellis story ...the trellis is a recent development, yes?

Hell raised by justrose on August 15, 2005 08:28 AM

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So... is there any difference between muscadines & grapes?

Hell raised by Harvey on August 16, 2005 12:49 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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The man definitely has a way with words. Heheh..

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 14, 2005 10:17 AM

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.. yep... he certainly do...

Hell raised by Eric on August 14, 2005 10:26 AM

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Well, if you're a masochist, you might like a hemorrhoid cream made from round glass and chili paste.

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 14, 2005 10:45 AM

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you can't!

Hell raised by justrose on August 14, 2005 01:46 PM

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You know... people have got to wonder how in the hell Grau and Harvey Blog spawned me. I look at my plain Jane blog about 3 boys... and then I read Harvey's Bad Example stuff or Grau, like the quote you have posted, and I think people must wonder what REALLY goes on in my head that they spawned me.

Grau cracks me up. His Retrosexual Code is classic. First blog I ever read...

Hell raised by Bou on August 14, 2005 05:04 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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You should be glad it was not 4:00 in the morning. I get calls all hours of the night for bloggers numbers. Everyone must have my number, cause I give numbers out, all the time. The good part about me, I don't sleep, Cat

Hell raised by Catfish on August 13, 2005 08:48 AM

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Hey Catfish, it was only about 7:30 or so when I called you the other night bro'. ;)

Eric, man, I just knew the post was gonna end with one of yall shootin' the damned phone...

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 13, 2005 09:05 AM

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Well... I just thought it was kind of cool that your lovely wife appeared around the corner, 9mm in hand.

Hell raised by Bou on August 13, 2005 09:55 AM

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So what did you call the dumb chick for in the first place??? hmmm?? bet wifey asked ya that more than once, huh? *L*

Hell raised by Michele on August 13, 2005 10:54 AM

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Neck, I was not talking about you

Hell raised by Catfish on August 13, 2005 12:57 PM

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That was a cool story all the way around.

Hell raised by Kelly on August 13, 2005 01:55 PM

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Heh. Well, I'm glad it wasn't me who called;-)

Don't watch "The Ring" if this sort of crap scares you, BTW.

Hell raised by sadie on August 13, 2005 07:37 PM

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My house is insured by Smith and Wesson.

Hell raised by gordon the magnificent on August 13, 2005 07:39 PM

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That story reminds me of a few episodes I had on the mini-farm. My alarm system was a large, barking dog.

If I went outside at night with my shotgun and I fired it, I'd soon see Jennifer's face at the back door. She had her .38 in her hand, loaded, cocked and ready.

"What is it, Rob?" she'd ask. Even when I shot a racoon, I told her. "Nothing. Let's go back to bed." I buried the coon the next day.

Jennifer with a gun in her hand never frightened me. She was part of my home-security team at the time. She knew how to shoot, too.

Now... Jennifer with a LAWYER is an entirely different story.

Hell raised by Acidman on August 13, 2005 11:01 PM

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Remind me not to make any beeping noises when I come over...

Hell raised by Harvey on August 14, 2005 12:29 PM

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I'm calling your ass early tomorrow morning...it will be a test!!!

Hell raised by Yabu on August 14, 2005 01:38 PM

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i have been freaky about things that go bump in the night lately too ... i make s get up and then worry until he comes back ... everything seems more creepy in the middle of the night!

Hell raised by justrose on August 14, 2005 01:49 PM

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Ever think about just turning the damn cell phone off?

Hell raised by james old guy on August 15, 2005 07:19 AM

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fucking dumb-ass... hahahaha!

Hell raised by Madfish Willie on August 15, 2005 10:49 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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"I simply whipped mine out" I wished I could whip mine out, but it's at home and I'm in the airport in Vegas. I've felt naked the past three days without my pocket knife.

Hell raised by phin on August 13, 2005 12:01 AM

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A pocketknife is one of the best tools any man can carry with him (other than his dick). I've used mine for everything from a box-cutter to a screwdriver.

Of course, I've never cut my arm open with mine.

I don't leave home without it.

Hell raised by Acidman on August 13, 2005 07:19 AM

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You whipped out your machete to open a carton of sodas? Any excuse to flash your blade at a party. Metal detector for the next blog meet.

Rick

Hell raised by recondo32 on August 13, 2005 09:20 AM

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I love my pocket knife. It's good for self surgery. And that superglue... it really did a nice job on that wound. Nice thin scar! ;-)

I bet all the Moms went home preaching to their kids about playing with knives. You are the Poster boy they KNOW for what not to do. Heh.

Hell raised by Bou on August 13, 2005 09:59 AM

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I thought the scar was AWESOME

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 13, 2005 12:41 PM

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"my seemingly unarmed trousers.... " seemingly??

Sounds more like Herbey!!1

Hell raised by Madfish Willie on August 15, 2005 10:52 PM

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what are you on about????

can I have some?

Hell raised by John on September 5, 2005 06:17 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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OK... what is really running through my mind is, how did you find this? Did you wake up and decide, "I need something really really odd to blog on... Oh. I know! I'll google sex, dementia, nursing home and see what I get!" ;-)

I just never know what I'm going to find over here. Cracks me up.

Hell raised by Bou on August 12, 2005 12:58 PM

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The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their
> > parents
> > > > >
> > > > > >to tell them a story with a moral behind it.
> > > > > >The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell
their
> > > > > >stories.
> > > > > > "Johnny, do you have a story to share?"
> > > > > > "Yes, ma'am, my daddy told a story about my Aunt Karen.
> > > > > > She was a pilot in Desert Storm and her plane got hit. She had
to
> > > > >bail
> > > > > >out
> > > > > > over enemy territory and all she had was a small flask of
whiskey,
> a
> > > > > >pistol
> > > > > > and a survival knife. She drank the whiskey on the way down so
it
> > > > > >wouldn't
> > > > > > break and then her parachute landed right in the middle of
twenty
> > > > >enemy
> > > > > >troops.
> > > > > > She shot fifteen of them with the gun until she ran out of
> bullets,
> > > > > >killed
> > > > > > four more with the knife 'till the blade broke, and then she
> killed
> > > > >the
> > > > > >last
> > > > > > Iraqi with her bare hands.
> > > > > > "Good heavens," said the horrified teacher, "what kind of moral
> did
> > > > >you
> > > > > > learn from that?
> > > > > > "Stay the fuck away from Aunt Karen when she's been drinking."

Hell raised by Mark on August 12, 2005 02:04 PM

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Old people need loving too.

Hell raised by livey on August 12, 2005 04:43 PM

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Old people scare me.

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 12, 2005 06:37 PM

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my mom's a nurse in a convalescent home. i've heard many a tale about the old folks getting it on. she's walked in on a few wrinkly rolls in her day. then she comes home and tells me about them. 10 years later and i still have trouble visiting my great- grandmother in the home for fear of what i might find. she's still pretty hot for a 98 year old! just a little senile.

Hell raised by jenE on August 13, 2005 07:05 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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My Dad is like yours was. Same exact way. And his father before him... and his father before him. Thank God I was born a girl. ;-) Otherwise, I'd never have escaped that pull!

Hell raised by Bou on August 11, 2005 08:59 PM

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And such is the description of what it feels like to do a good days work...........
Great post. Enjoy the scotch...... :-)

Hell raised by Richmond on August 11, 2005 09:56 PM

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Right on, man. As long as you are glad you had him. I gave up trying to understand my old man years ago, but I tell you what....it will be a difficult pill to swallow when the day comes that he is no longer around.

Hell raised by bitterman on August 11, 2005 11:33 PM

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If we could understand those we love, how would we pass the hours thinking of them?

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 11, 2005 11:39 PM

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I think it is a difference in the generations....they had the depression, and the war on top of that (tho dad missed it by a couple of years) guess they had it instilled at an early age no job was worth doing if it wasn't done well. And yah, dad was one for keeping his stuff in ship shape, and would not stop til whatever project he was working on was completed....or some outside force caused him to pause (an unexpected part/item was needed from the hardware store...which was already closed for example)...other then that..the job got done.

Hell raised by Guy S on August 12, 2005 12:20 AM

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Keep digging bruther!!!

Hell raised by Yabu on August 12, 2005 12:26 AM

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You know, I see that kind of way of working come a lot from people who were on farms. My dad was like that, too. He was UNHAPPY if he didn't have some back breaking work to do every day.

I think it appears that way around here, too. I know my husband works all day and then comes home and does yard work or whatever his particular project is.

We're both do it done and right kind of people. Some of that comes from having to work around people who don't take care of their stuff, who don't have any kind of work ethic, who have NO IDEA how to do it right..at least at home, things can be done...our way.

Alot of the constancy of the pace comes from there's a certain amount of work to be done every day. If it doesn't get done, then your list is going to be twice as long tomorrow.

Hell raised by Kelly on August 12, 2005 08:19 AM

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Good read SWG. We all come to that realization that we are our parents to some degree.

Hell raised by Ronj on August 12, 2005 10:23 AM

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AWESOME Cus. Reminds me of a time when we built fence. By the way it was looking good last week I am sure it looks even better this week. A little hard works really goes a looooooong way don't it? Enjoyed the it.

Hell raised by Big Daddy C on August 12, 2005 11:53 AM

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Great day for you... I do that every fucking day of my life (building custom swimming pools)... FYI: sand and gravel make sand and gravel... not makeshift mortar... you need lime, water, and aggreagate (sand & gravel) to make a cementitious mortar.

Hell raised by Madfish Willie on August 12, 2005 07:20 PM

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Just fuckin' with you a bit...

My used to admire my granfather for working in his yard and fixing stuff - he was an airplane mechanic through 3 different wars and he could fix ANYTHING mechanical - he was a great man!

Hell raised by Madfish Willie on August 12, 2005 07:22 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Issues...

Hell raised by zonker on August 11, 2005 03:54 PM

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Somewhere where it won't show up at work, or, at a minimum, at a job interview (depending on the kind of gig you are seeking).

I'd opt for getting it on someone els's arm.

Hell raised by Jim -PRS on August 11, 2005 04:25 PM

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Stick with the classic Bulldog, no Spongebob, if you have to get one. Just remember, almost everyone has one these days. Those of us with perfect skin will soon be the most revered.

As an alternative, I heard a great thought about tattoos: Think about where and who you were 10 years go. If you drew a picture on yourself 10 years ago with what was so important to you then, would you be happy with it today? A bulldog eating Alf?

Hell raised by Scott on August 11, 2005 05:50 PM

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Those flags over at my site... they are supposed to be a tattoo I've never gotten

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 11, 2005 06:51 PM

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Spongebob, Squidward... love the thoughts. Heheh...

Were I ever to get a tattoo, I'd go upper arm/shoulder. Like Jim said, keep it out of sight during an interview. Of course, that's only if I were to get a tat. (Another)

As for the classic bulldog, while I like it, every other Marine has something like it. Go with something no one else has.

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 11, 2005 07:28 PM

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Don't do it, Eric. Take the advice of someone much older than you are. I started to do it more than once in my life and I'm glad now that I never followed through.

But if you INSIST on getting one, have it done on your ass. It's less painful and then only speacial people can see it.

Trust me on this.

Hell raised by Acidman on August 11, 2005 07:44 PM

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I have several tattoos and I'd love to get at least one more. Just remember to BREATHE when you get it. I can't tell you how many times I've seen a guy pass out because he could not take the pain of a little needle and breathe properly.

Hell raised by Maeve on August 12, 2005 12:00 AM

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men should start with tatoos on arm or chest....

they really don't hurt that bad

make sure it is something you can live with

Hell raised by ArmyWifeToddlerMom on August 17, 2005 01:09 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Ah... sweet memories... Anyways, good luck with the patio! Be sure to publish some pictures of it!

Hell raised by Ann on August 11, 2005 09:48 AM

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Sunscreen and a hat are your friends!!!

Hell raised by Bou on August 11, 2005 02:52 PM

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I offer my help on the patio if it isn't done by this weekend.

I might not be smart but I can move heavy things.

Hell raised by Scott on August 11, 2005 05:54 PM

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Looks like a Meucci Original. I still have one I bought 17 years ago - sweet stick. I might have to make a road trip over there and see if I can give you a run for your money - especially if there's moonshine involved.

Hell raised by Dash on August 11, 2005 09:59 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Boy, is Tom Cruise going to be pissed when he hears that!

Hell raised by WitNit on August 10, 2005 11:57 AM

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I'm anti-faking... after all, no sense in rewarding a poor performance...

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 10, 2005 03:57 PM

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I agree with Princess Cat. It's especially detrimental if it's a regular partner.

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 10, 2005 07:57 PM

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Say it ain't so...women FAKE orgasms?? *gasp*

Hell raised by poopie on August 10, 2005 08:27 PM

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Personally, I don't think women need to fake...they just need the right partner. {wink}

Hell raised by ali on August 10, 2005 09:18 PM

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Women fake because otherwise they would have to share their FEELINGS...

;-)

Hell raised by WitNit on August 11, 2005 11:51 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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No, Eric. You have the RIGHT perspective.

Hell raised by Acidman on August 9, 2005 11:01 AM

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Sometimes you need to take joy in little things (waking up, fresh coffee, an email from a long-almost-lost friend) ... and sometimes we get to see truly good things (alive POWs, saving submariners, safe return of astronauts).

And then, sometimes, you need to shoot something.
/TJ
... NIF

Hell raised by TJ on August 9, 2005 12:39 PM

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Good grief did this post ever speak to me.

You're so right. Where DID we lose our joy and wonder? Is it because there's so many bad things in the world and we focus on them instead of the good?

Hell raised by blondage on August 9, 2005 01:27 PM

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I've been struggling with that myself lately. Seems like I'd lost my joy. But it comes back - you just have to look for it. Which you did.

I recommend a movie Teresa shared with me. DISH. It will remind you have the excitement and joy when we first walked on the moon. Incredible.

Hell raised by Tammi on August 9, 2005 02:38 PM

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I was so happy this morning to watch it touch down. A perfect landing from what I could see. I was late for work because I was not going to miss this! I even woke up early yesterday morning in anticipation of watching them land, then going back to sleep. I've been watching the NASA live feed for the past two weeks, the replays anyways. I am still in awe of the space program.

Hell raised by Tina on August 9, 2005 03:17 PM

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I missed seeing it land, but am glad they are home safe. I have never quite lost my wonder with it, even knowing it warts and all. Mayhaps you and I need to go out to the Mojave Space Port and visit XCOR, Scaled, and a few others. What you see there will fill you with pride, wonder, hope and more. May have to promise your better half not to let you buy one of the rocket plane kits...

Hell raised by Laughing Wolf on August 9, 2005 03:32 PM

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You've just put into words the nagging feeling I've been having all day today. I am a huge space geek and followed this mission closely. But this morning, I woke up and found my feelings of hope that I've experienced over the past few weeks gone. The shuttle and her crew are home...now we go back to the 'normal' bad news.

Hell raised by Chablis on August 10, 2005 07:59 PM

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I find great joy every morning when I look into the mirror... I marvel that tomorrow I will be ever more so handsome than I am today!

Hell raised by Madfish Willie on August 12, 2005 07:25 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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More power to 'em :-)

Hell raised by Harvey on August 9, 2005 01:23 PM

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Well, you can tell it's Canada and not the US - here we have people who DON'T get married because of the marriage tax penalty!!!

Hell raised by Teresa on August 9, 2005 05:22 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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You know I love that one!

; )

Hell raised by Christina on August 8, 2005 07:31 PM

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.. I know... I just wish I could have posted it under different circumstances....

Hell raised by Eric on August 8, 2005 07:37 PM

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Hope everything is ok at the casa...

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 8, 2005 10:12 PM

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No surprise that this is a favorite of mine. I hope that "circumstances" improve for you......

Hell raised by Richmond on August 9, 2005 10:25 AM

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Christina and Johnny Carson; Both class acts. (I can't help but hear Bette singing this to Johnny...)

Hell raised by WitNit on August 9, 2005 12:16 PM

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Here's hoping the next pic you post is not of a gun in your mouth.
Cheers!

Hell raised by Marcus on August 10, 2005 12:23 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Thank God for denial. It's kept me in the same dead-end profession for the last 8 years.

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 8, 2005 03:41 PM

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you're too kind..thanks, eric..

Hell raised by shoe on August 8, 2005 08:16 PM

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Eric - Shoe bears a striking resemblance to the lovely Fiona.

Hell raised by Denny on August 10, 2005 11:08 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Ahhh.

It would appear you have no garden...

; )

Hell raised by Christina on August 7, 2005 11:12 AM

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We chose to de-claw my cat when he was a kitten, and he doesn't know he has no claws. However, don't let them outside again if you declaw them - no offense also means no defense (yes, mine is permanently an indoor kitty). Also - removng their claws at this stage in their lives is not the same as doing so when they are babes. They'll survive, but it's not a good thing. They've learned to maneuver with claws as part of the equation - taking them now would be kinda cruel.

Hell raised by Barb on August 7, 2005 11:13 AM

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You have to admit that you enjoy their company once in awhile? Um, I've been on the phone when you were talking to one of them.

"Here Kitty kitty kitty. Oh you're sooooo pretty. My little schmoopikins!"

Heh.

Hell raised by sadie on August 7, 2005 03:40 PM

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Nature is a harsh and cruel mistress. The cat is merely doing what eons of genetic programming have told him is vital...he kills, even without need. The skills must be kept honed, passed to the next generation.

You are absolutely right, Eric...if every cat in the world suddenly weighed 200 pounds, we would be in dire trouble! Anyone ever tried to capture or hold a cat that didn't want to participate? A 10 pound cat can inflict some grievous wounds. Multiply that 10 pounds by 20 and imagine the possibilities. A 200 pound man might last 30 seconds, unless the cat just wanted to toy with him. Then he would wish it were ONLY 30 seconds...

Still, I wouldn't de-claw them. They have natural predators, too, and other than speed claws are their only defense.

Hell raised by Wayne on August 7, 2005 04:07 PM

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Domesticated animals still have natural drives.. all of them. We just think that they become our friends through domestication. And maybe they do.

I wouldn't de-claw them. As you pointed out, it's nature. Perhaps because it was baby bunnies, it is disturbing. Were it a snake, I'd be cheering the bastards on!

No, I wouldn't worry about it until you get up one morn, and see them munching on a neighbour kid. Then it's shotgun time.

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 7, 2005 04:35 PM

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schmoopikins? LOL

Hell raised by livey on August 7, 2005 05:17 PM

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... for the record, I have never said "schmoopikins" in my entire life...

Hell raised by Eric on August 7, 2005 05:55 PM

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Just so you *know* it's called "de-clawing" but it's really not like somehow they just remove the nails. It's the entire first digit. So look at yer fingers and imagine them snipped off at the knuckle between the first and second digit. YUK.

But before I *knew* that tid-bit, I did have my cat de-clawed... and she still caught birds and small mammals...because that IS their nature and prediliction. Sorry!! (And if they were bigger you *might* be on the menu. LOL)

Hell raised by Karen on August 7, 2005 08:16 PM

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This is why I own 2 small dogs.

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 7, 2005 08:46 PM

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Cody - the puppy - almost got a rabbit the other morning. Damn that dog is fast. But anyway - cats that are outdoors have to be able to defend themselves. I've just either always kept them in side, except for the barn cats of course.

Hell raised by Tammi on August 7, 2005 09:26 PM

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We have 3 cats. We keep them indoors. End of story. They are cats - they will catch and kill, after maiming and "playing" with, anything that moves. I have been known to rescue silly lizards that make the mistake of wandering onto our porch - and hence, get caught by one of the 3 kitties.

Keep them indoors. That way, you can live with the illusion that they are pets - and they WILL appreciate your love and affection. And then they can't kill bunnies, bunny babies and small birds that weren't quick enough.

Cats should be kept indoors.

Hell raised by suzeisnotfooledbyislam on August 7, 2005 10:48 PM

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Good luck finding a vet who will still do declawing without giving you a hard time about it. It's cruel and inhumane now. I had to tell my vet that she'd see something REALLY cruel and inhumane if my recent addition clawed my livingroom set.

Hell raised by Chablis on August 8, 2005 03:56 AM

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Reason number 5,231 why we have dogs.... Poor Bunnies.

Hell raised by Richmond on August 8, 2005 10:49 AM

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Our two kitties have their claws and will never see the world from the outside looking in. They have a nice big cage, called house and they are content when I turn on cat TV (door wall overseeing bird feeder), and I plan on keeping it that way. De-clawing is cruel, so we clip their claws every two weeks. It's good to know they can defend themselves if they need to!)

Hell raised by Kat on August 8, 2005 12:18 PM

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A good cat is a dead cat!

Especially those mother fockers that live behind us that think our bushes, that have been replaced 3 times because the urine is killing them, is their litter pan.

I hate cats.

Hell raised by Machelle on August 8, 2005 02:09 PM

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it's cats being cats. it is sad when they get the baby bunnies though. mine stay inside and do the same thing to waterbugs -- when they can be bothered to.

hope the week gets better ... great song.

Hell raised by justrose on August 8, 2005 07:11 PM

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Wow, they sound like good hunters.

Where do you live? I'll take them off your hands this afternoon.

Get a cat that's not a good hunter (they have to be taught.) You can rest easy, knowing that the FDA says a *few* mouseturds aren't going to kill you. Well, as long as the mice don't have hantavirus, and even then the good new about hantavirus is that the coma precludes any spirit-destroying regret.

Hell raised by Jones on August 8, 2005 07:17 PM

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And man will stop at a McDonalds to get a ham and egg in the morning before going hunting. It's the thrill of the chase, the pursuit, and the sweet reward at the end.

Cause c'mon you know when people come home after hunting and are lugging in the meat, the cat thinks, "Showoff."

Hell raised by Cythen on August 10, 2005 12:55 PM

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Quoted and linked for Thur
'Quotes I like Day'
thank you

Hell raised by GrampaPinhead on August 11, 2005 03:51 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Dude!!!

Don't jinx either of them!!!

Hell raised by Jack on August 6, 2005 11:56 AM

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I just called my bookie and put a hundy on the Russkies.

Hell raised by Velociman on August 6, 2005 12:56 PM

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Makes me wanna put on my old "Canned Heat" albums.

Hell raised by BULLSEYE on August 6, 2005 03:58 PM

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It seems to me there is a joke to be made about semen in here somewhere, but I shan't stoop so low.

I will, however, be watching the reentry Monday as avidly as I tune in to NASCAR when the track is wet.

Prognosis is not good. Were I one of the nine, I would be waving at the other eight from a porthole of the space station as they departed.

Hell raised by Bane on August 6, 2005 04:25 PM

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OK, this is why it's NEVER a good idea to go somewhere where there is NO oxygen!

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 6, 2005 04:56 PM

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You got the "broke-dick" part about the shuttle right. I hope they make it home, but we need to junk that fucker and go with something else.

We're better than that.

Hell raised by Acidman on August 7, 2005 10:46 AM

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I am a US Submarine vet. I did a radio interview a couple years ago on Space Travel and innerspace (submarines)travel.. they are very much alike in many ways.

Hell raised by Brian on August 8, 2005 05:23 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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The man lives in Iowa... of course he's gone crazy... but it's really not his fault - HE LIVES IN IOWA!

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 6, 2005 10:53 AM

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A real swashdickler!

Hell raised by Jim - PRS on August 6, 2005 02:22 PM

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One would think that a guy should, um, holster the swinging body parts to keep 'em safe ...

Hell raised by Barb on August 7, 2005 11:15 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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OH Eric I would gladly help you. Unfortunately, I live so far away and I'm so damn poor you would have to send me a plane ticket to get me there and feed me while I was there. I don't think it's worth it you now do you?

Hell raised by livey on August 5, 2005 02:59 PM

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I'd offer to help, 'cept I don't image you'd want a supervisor. Me and Manuel don't get along very well either.

Hell raised by phin on August 5, 2005 03:22 PM

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Sorry Pops... I'm a little broke myself at the moment. Damn doc can't see me til Monday!

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 5, 2005 03:53 PM

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Phew. Thank God I'm not in YOUR blogfamily. Harvey and Grau NEVER require any manual labor from me! Sheesh!

Hell raised by Bou on August 5, 2005 03:56 PM

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.. see what I mean?.. what a bunch of shirkers...

Hell raised by Eric on August 5, 2005 03:58 PM

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Well, dayum... once I get the plumber, chimney sweep, electrician, radon remediator, radon inspectors, out of my house... find a house, pack my stuff, clean old house, get the movers to finish their thing... I'll be right over. Of course you may be finished by then - unless you want to sit back and wait a month or two.

Hell raised by Teresa on August 5, 2005 04:06 PM

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OHHHH I am SO resisting the urge to say shirk this dude! I realize you don't know me, and I'm in a pissy mood, so I just won't say it dammit.

But if you want to send me a plane ticket and feed me I'd be very happy to help a poor old thing like you dear. ;)

Hell raised by livey on August 5, 2005 05:30 PM

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You know, I really *would* have offered to help but considering the commute *and* the fact that I swore I would NEVER move another patio paving stone again(after re-doing my own patio this spring) it just was not to be!! Maybe I could send libations instead -- or at least some Icy Hot and Advil...

Hell raised by Richmond on August 5, 2005 05:36 PM

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Now how come I know that you're the kinda guy who would want to say, "I did it all myself, without any help whatsoever."

And then you would show us your limp from the rock you dropped on your foot, and then the sunburn scars, and then the funny pain-in-the-groin walk...

Ya gotta have good stories to tell us blogsphere computer potato geeks...

On the other hand:

BLOGMEET AT ERICS. FULLY STOCKED BAR AND BBQ. (Some manual labor required.)

Hell raised by Mark on August 5, 2005 06:01 PM

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I'm game! Anyhow, I could use some heat, it is about 60 degrees here and raining. Unlimited cold Corona must be provided.

Hell raised by Alaska Kim on August 5, 2005 06:10 PM

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I was going to offer to help but you took me off the blogroll and I wasn't sure if I welcome here anymore.

;)

Hell raised by chris on August 5, 2005 07:22 PM

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Dude... I can be there in twelve hours! 'Course then I'll have to leave there shortly after, but...

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 5, 2005 08:16 PM

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I'm only a step-sis. I'm not even spose to like your red-headed behind...

But, very well, I will line up the subs. Where are their numbers?

:D!

Hell raised by Key on August 5, 2005 09:02 PM

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Lemme know when the work is finished. I'm retired. I don't do that shit anymore.

But Pina Coloadas in the shade sounds nice...

Hell raised by Acidman on August 5, 2005 09:33 PM

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pina coladas? rock on!

Hell raised by justrose on August 5, 2005 10:32 PM

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Would love to, but am a bit far away. Of course, I could ride down with T1G, but...

Hell raised by Laughing Wolf on August 5, 2005 10:54 PM

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If you want those patio blocks duct taped down, I'm your guy.

Hell raised by Jim - PRS on August 5, 2005 11:15 PM

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You come help me strip my roof, re-do the barge rafters and fascia boards, re-sheet and re-roof, and install gutters, and I'll help you with your patio!

Hell raised by Mark on August 5, 2005 11:18 PM

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On the other hand, it sometimes doesn't seem to be a good idea to... exchange... these signs of friendship... ;)

Hell raised by Ann on August 6, 2005 06:44 AM

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WE have jobs, asshole!

Hell raised by Velociman on August 6, 2005 11:38 AM

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I was planning on helping out during post-construction stress testing.

Hell raised by Graumagus on August 7, 2005 04:12 PM

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sorry, daddy-o, but i'm with vman...i hadn't seen you down here yet cleaning up "your share" of the puke, or building "your share" of the lego x wing...i could go on, but why?

Hell raised by shoe on August 7, 2005 10:16 PM

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Had I known ahead of time, I'd have been there.

Give us a heads up some time and MAYBE I'll even bring some beer just to be neighborly.

S

Hell raised by Scott on August 8, 2005 01:11 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Yep, Abdul is planning kinky things with that stick!!

Hell raised by Junebugg on August 5, 2005 12:00 PM

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Hey... Abdul looks like me at a comment party :-/

Hell raised by Harvey on August 5, 2005 01:38 PM

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You're quite right... it's the smile that scares me too. Or it was until I read Harvey's comment.

Hell raised by Teresa on August 5, 2005 02:09 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Pulled something in the old groin, eh? Or are we talking about those lower back muscles?

What exactly were you doing? Better be worth it...

Hell raised by WitNit on August 4, 2005 07:59 PM

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See??? That's what happens when you spend time watching a Victoria's Secret location -- you're bound to pull something! ;-)

Hell raised by Richmond on August 4, 2005 08:44 PM

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You are so right. The pain in always worse on the 2nd day. Advil is your friend... and a full body massage, courtesy of your lovely wife. ;-)

Hell raised by Bou on August 4, 2005 09:48 PM

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... I hurt from the sunburn on my forehead to the soles of my feet... toting rocks for the patio.. and, yes, my groin is sore too...

Hell raised by Eric on August 4, 2005 09:59 PM

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Yep, I bet you're right. 'Cause you KNOW, somebody is gonna tell you that you've done a great job, and now, since you did that job so well, you can move 'em back to where they came from...

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 4, 2005 10:16 PM

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Heheh... you know I would have helped while I was visiting! Glad you waited. I try to keep muscular pain to a minimum.

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 4, 2005 10:43 PM

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So that deck's kicking your arse just a wee bit, is it? You need more water breaks...

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 5, 2005 12:23 AM

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Are your fingers cracked and bloodied, too?

Blood doesn't work well on a keyboard, it makes the keys stick.

; )

(Aleve, before and after libations... Don't worry, the liver has wonderful rejuvenative powers.)

Hell raised by Christina on August 5, 2005 09:08 AM

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Magnesium is the best thing in the world for sore muscles. It is a natural muscle relaxer and good for other things too. (cramps...) You have to get them from the vitamin store in capsule form for them to work the best. They come in 400mg and I always take mine with milk so I get the right calcium mix..(they go together). There's a story involving a car accident and heavy medication that led me to the magnesium discovery. They work better than Flexiril...without leaving you groggy or hungover the next morning.

Hell raised by Kelly on August 5, 2005 09:18 AM

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Potassium helps too. Slam some bananas.

Hell raised by blondage on August 5, 2005 11:14 AM

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Eric doing manual labor !!!!!! Whats next Acidman adopting kittens.

Hell raised by James Old Guy on August 5, 2005 11:23 AM

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So does getting rite back at it and working today as you did yesterday, and tomorrow. YOU CAN DOT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hell raised by B on August 5, 2005 11:27 AM

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... just for the record, people.. a day wherein I sweat, is a day that I failed...

Hell raised by Eric on August 5, 2005 11:38 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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The only part of your post I liked was the "Shut the Hell up!" part.

Hell raised by Velociman on August 3, 2005 06:25 PM

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Are you a blog post grader, Velociman? If you are then I am too and I like every part of every post that Eric makes :)

Hell raised by Reilly on August 3, 2005 09:25 PM

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He's my maid of honor, Eric...or rather, matron of honor.

Priceless, wasn't it?

Hell raised by sadie on August 4, 2005 02:22 AM

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A sexy beast, indeed!

Hell raised by That 1 Guy on August 4, 2005 08:21 AM

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A man who knows how to wear a hat.

Hell raised by WitNit on August 4, 2005 02:20 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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So, you won't go into the store, but does the catalog get delivered to your house?

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 3, 2005 09:19 AM

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... it will after yesterday's purchases... oh, yeah...

Hell raised by Eric on August 3, 2005 09:23 AM

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Good for those lonely evenings when the wife is away.

Hell raised by New York Moments on August 3, 2005 09:33 AM

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Face it, they all wondered about the perv who hangs out in front of Vickie's sucking loudly on his milkshake, a demonstration of all sorts innuendo ... :)

Hell raised by Hip Liz on August 3, 2005 10:27 AM

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You said 'slushy'.....

Hell raised by sadie on August 3, 2005 10:45 AM

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ROTFL! I can just picture this man sitting in front of Victoria's drinking a milkshake checking out the women.

Hell raised by vw bug on August 3, 2005 11:23 AM

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To steal a bit from Jeff Foxworthy.

They where memorizing your face so they could look you up in the sex offender registry!

I hate going in there myself. I always feel out of place. When my wife does go in, I'm usually checking out another store or not with her, because *I* wont sit out front feeling like a perv either.

Then again the VS store in our mall is really tame, there really is little to nothing sexy in there, it's just standard underwear.

Hell raised by Contagion on August 3, 2005 11:36 AM

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I went to Victoria Secretes with the missus shortly after we were married. One of the saleswomen walked of and snidely asked if she could help me find anything.

The saleswoman and the missus were appalled when I picked up the nearest thong and asked if they had it in my size.

Needless to say the missus hasn't invited me to go back with her, I kinda miss it now.

Hell raised by phin on August 3, 2005 01:05 PM

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I for one am truely jealous of you.

Drinking a Godiva milkshake ... heaven, pure heaven

And I thought you said you would eat Mac and Cheese before chocolate?

Hell raised by Machelle on August 3, 2005 01:13 PM

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Yes, yes...you ARE a freak of nature. A chocolate sipping, panty-consumed, bag-questioning freak of nature. But it's kinda cute...in a "slushy" sort of way. ;)

Hell raised by Dana on August 3, 2005 01:45 PM

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Maybe the poor lasses were confused...I mean, there's this older guy sitting there perving out in front of the store...but he's wearing these really metrosexual shoes. Pure confusion.

Oh, and start photoblogging events like this, please!

Hell raised by zonker on August 3, 2005 02:06 PM

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Ugh, I would turn 4 shades of red if I walked out of a VS and found a man there. And it wouldn't be because I thought he was a perv, I would assume he was waiting on someone... but just because stuff like that does embarrass me.

The only think better than a Godiva milkshake is a Godiva Chocolate Martini. To die for.

Hell raised by Bou on August 3, 2005 02:12 PM

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You were sporting an enormous grim...what?

There's a mind picture.

In many of the VicSec shops, the staff will model for you if it appears you are going to spend a good chunk of change in there. A good regular customer can get modeling every time.

I don't think I could handle the stress, and yes, I'd be sporting an enormous grim one, too.

Hell raised by Bane on August 3, 2005 04:02 PM

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.. heh... I was wondering if anyone would catch that...

Hell raised by Eric on August 3, 2005 04:05 PM

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The last time I was in VS with my husband was when my kids were about 5 years old. VS was having their big sale, so I went in there while Hubby took the boys somewhere else. Evidently, I was taking too long, so Hubby brought the boys into VS to find me. While there, one of the boys picked up a pair of leopard print panties (with attached matching bra, of course) and said, "here, Mommy! These are cool!" Needless to say, Hubby just had to buy them for me. I was mortified...

Hell raised by Beth on August 3, 2005 06:03 PM

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ROFL!!! Glad you had such a good time. I shop at VS, I like some of their stuff. Now the Godiva shake... that sounds incredible! If I wasn't afraid it would give me a raging migraine - I'd run out and find the nearest Godiva store around here and get my own. *grin*

Hell raised by Teresa on August 3, 2005 06:20 PM

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I don't trust my other half in Vic Secrets anymore. He runs around touching everything, picks stuff out for me to try on (and makes quite a scene on purpose to embarass me -"HONEY! Will you try these crotchless panties on for me???")and tries to peek under the changing room door. It's amazing he hasn't gotten arrested yet.

Hell raised by blondage on August 3, 2005 08:39 PM

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Well all I can say is I hope you had fun and I loved the tile in the banos in Mexico.

Hell raised by georgia on August 4, 2005 12:25 AM

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Well dayum, I feel special. I got a whole Victoria's Secret birthday from my husband one year.

I got a matching bra and panties with rhinestones on them...a whole bunch of the cotton panties, slippers, silk pajamas and a terricloth robe that I LOVE.

Since he did that, he hasn't had to go in. I go in myself and model what he (I) got for me(him)...LOL.

Who knew that he secretly had so much fun shopping..LOL!

Hell raised by Kelly on August 4, 2005 12:01 PM

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my favorite store -- i park my husband in front of it for at least an hour ... and he never minds when i emerge with an apricot bag ... i usually get him a milkshake of some sort before we go in, to keep him busy ...

Hell raised by justrose on August 5, 2005 04:13 AM

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I sooooo should have seen this before and linked it to my maul post today....damn.....

glances....yeah we see...

Hell raised by ArmyWifeToddlerMom on October 9, 2005 10:36 PM

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Recently, riding the escalator down in the neighborhood mall, I was treated to a wonderful scene above as a young lady strolled to the railing in her tiny miniskirt. I still don't know if she was wearing a thong or not, but it sure was exciting to watch her cheeks move under there. I wish I had the courage to write it up in my own blog. Thanks for this post.

Hell raised by John M on October 15, 2005 03:11 PM

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« Shut the hell up!

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LOL!

Hell raised by vw bug on August 2, 2005 12:46 PM

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Godiva chocolate?!

Hell raised by Bou on August 2, 2005 01:51 PM

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chocolate? Now, that's a hunting trip I can sign up for!

Hell raised by Princess Cat on August 2, 2005 01:54 PM

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Oh man! My going out to lunch days are still weeks away! I hope that you bag your limit though......

Hell raised by Richmond on August 2, 2005 02:29 PM

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Do you use a gun or bow to go after that chocolate? Which one does a better job of bagging it for you? I feel that these are vital questions... answers are necessary!

Hell raised by Teresa on August 2, 2005 03:08 PM

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.. thanks, Ladies.. it was a resounding success...

Hell raised by Eric on August 3, 2005 09:17 AM

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« Shut the hell up!

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Ha!

Would you believe I had that and others on 8-track once upon a time??

My favorites were going hunting with cousin Marcel (??) and "makin' biscuits."

; )

Hell raised by Christina on August 1, 2005 06:07 PM

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How does the end of "knock him out John" go? Something like..."Well shoot up in here amongst us...one of us has got to have some relief"....haha..I can't remember word for word anymore but I got that cassette tape somewhere around here...I always got tickled over the "Chandelier" one.

Hell raised by Sandy on August 1, 2005 08:59 PM

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My Grandpa would tape them on cassettes. He'd get so tickled, he would have tears running down his face. That's one of the funnest things I used to do with my Grandpa-sitting and listening to those old tapes.
They're somewhere in my Mom's house now.

Hell raised by Tina on August 1, 2005 09:52 PM

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Check your email, brother. Maybe I can help.

Hell raised by Scott on August 1, 2005 09:59 PM

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The follow up to the Knock Him Out John! story is almost as funny. "Just as Johns'foot hit the ground my brother Sonny mocked that thing and John went right back to the top!Come on down John, Sonny was just funnin!"

Hell raised by Rey on August 1, 2005 10:11 PM

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What about the "blue collar" tour? Those guys are southern and pretty darn funny if you ask me.

Hell raised by Maeve on August 1, 2005 11:12 PM

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I bet your boy Bitterman could help you out with that one - bein' from Miss'ippi and all. I seem to recall a JC clip posted by Redneck, too.

Hell raised by Dash on August 1, 2005 11:25 PM

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Oh man, am I out of it. I never heard of Jerry Clowers. Get me up to speed, Eric!

Hell raised by WitNit on August 1, 2005 11:31 PM

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ummm.. who? Never heard of either.

Hell raised by Contagion on August 2, 2005 08:43 AM

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Yep, Neck posted some a while back.

"look, until I can downloading free Jerry Clower clips with ease, this whole internet thing just sucks ass..." Good to see you have your priorities in order, Eric. Haha!

Hell raised by zonker on August 2, 2005 09:21 AM

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Someone needs to sic Marcel on this... Of course, doing so might just produce a lot of unexpected results too.

Hell raised by Laughing Wolf on August 2, 2005 09:48 AM

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Marcel said "Wright that down".

Eric, Their should be one over at the 'Neckshack somewhere... I'll gmail it to you if I can find out which pile it's in.

Hell raised by RedNeck on August 2, 2005 10:01 AM

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I always liked the story about how they got the New Fire Truck. You remember... Gene, New-Gene, and all the others racing fearlessly into the church-fire?

Hell raised by Acidman on August 2, 2005 01:04 PM

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Ah, Jerry Clower. Haven't heard him in years. Didn't have any clips handy, but I'm downloading a hundred or so clips right now. Stuff is out there, you just need to know where to look. See, there's hope for this Internet thing yet.

So where do you want them?

Hell raised by Evilwhiteguy on August 2, 2005 11:02 PM

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damn!I saw Jerry Clower on CMT and he is the funniest damn thing i have ever seen.
He's up there with all ov the blue collar boys.
Knock em' out John.
thats funny right there,i dont care who you are.

Hell raised by Mike Pitts on November 1, 2005 08:06 AM

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« Shut the hell up!