.... I had the television on in the background most of the day yesterday... not really paying it much attention, it was just noise... but as I headed into the hallway, a phrase caught my attention... it was Shakespeare... so I strolled back through and paid a little attention...

... it was one of the Star Trek movies... Kirk's ship was disabled or something... and there was a Klingon captain shooting at the Enterprise... and each time he'd volley a shot, out would come some random Shakespearian quote... I was mesmerized... I mean, since when do the Klingons go around memorizing Shakespeare?...

... then I remembered when that dude Khan quoted Herman Melville on his fiery deathbed in that other Star Trek movie....

... you know, the one where a mentally disturbed Kirk bellowed "KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!"...

... Star Trek sure has some well-read bad guys.... It almost makes me want to dig into some Willie Shakespeare and bone-up....

.. I mean, if I were ever in a hairy situation, it'd be so much cooler to say something like... "if you cut me, do I not bleed?" just before pulling out my pistole and blasting someone to smithereens.. just screaming "Die, Motherfucker!" doesn't sound nearly as cool...

.. I think we all need to read more books... you know, just in case we're ever in one of those scenarios... besides, we'd all want our last words to be memorable...

by Eric on June 14, 2006 | Bullshit (15) | TrackBack (0) | Psycho Rants
Bullshit So Far

My English professor would be delighted to read this!

Bullshitted by Lisa W. on June 14, 2006 08:17 AM

I quote shakespeare at strange times. I was doing the laundry and said "Out Damned Spot!" and my kid told me "momma, its not nice to yell at clothes."

Bullshitted by oddybobo on June 14, 2006 08:24 AM

... heh heh... good one...

Bullshitted by Eric on June 14, 2006 08:58 AM

There was apparently a big dinner discussion on Star Trek one where someone said 'Shakespeare sounds best in the original Klingon,' which is something I know not from watching the show but a book on Shakespeare in pop culture.
The sheer number and variety of other references in there to The Bard would blow your mind.

Bullshitted by Serrabee on June 14, 2006 01:13 PM

yeah, quote sumthin like "we be a band of brothers..but you can't carry a tune DIE MUTHA FUKKA" Bahahahaha

Bullshitted by GUYK on June 14, 2006 01:42 PM

Read more books (not blogs???) Honey, I have to choose one or the other most days... Not both. ;)

Bullshitted by Richmond on June 14, 2006 03:11 PM

Who know that you were a 'Trekie!

Bullshitted by Junebugg on June 14, 2006 04:04 PM

"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total oblivion..."

"Circus-Circus is what the whole hep world would be doing on a Saturday night if the Nazis had won the war."

"Call me Ishmael.
Call me Ahab.
Just don't call me
Late for Dinner."

Bullshitted by Elisson on June 14, 2006 04:52 PM

"What fools these mortals be..."

"What? Sir, do you bite your thumb at me?"

"Tis a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

"Alas, poor Yorik. I knew him , Horatio..."

"Screw your courage to the sticking post!"

"Music soothes the savage breast."

"Lay ON, MacDuff!!"

"Fear not... till Burnham Wood doth come to Dunsinane..."

"Neither a borrower nor a lender be... for loan doth often lose both itself and friend..."

"What light from yonder window breaks?"

"So fair and foul a day I have not seen..."

"To be... or NOT to be... THAT is the question..."

Don't get me started. I hated Shakespere in high school, but when I became a college English Major, I found absolute bliss in reading him.

I think I got stoned with Rosencrantz and Gildenstern once... or maybe it was the three witches in MacBeth... perhaps with Horatio, when he mourned the death of his "fair prince."

I DO remember hearing, "Beware yon Cassius. He has a lean and hungry look."

Besides... Iago was one of the best, most rotten-assed villians in all of recorded literature and I would LOVE to see Tim Roth play that role. Or try it myself.

I'd do my best to give that role the "pound of flesh" it deserved...

Bullshitted by Acidman on June 14, 2006 07:58 PM

... I have been to Dunsinane... and didn't Tim Roth play in "Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead"...

Bullshitted by Eric on June 14, 2006 08:15 PM

Sadly enough, you can get the complete works of Shakespeare in Klingon. At Barnes and Noble no less.

Bullshitted by Graumagus on June 15, 2006 03:29 AM

Here you go:

Bullshitted by That 1 Guy on June 15, 2006 08:45 AM

Bullshitted by Harvey on June 15, 2006 01:38 PM

Eric - In the original series, when Kirk exiled Kahn to the planet, Kahn quoted Milton from Paradise Lost. Milton? WTF? And there was another episode based loosely on Shakespeare's The Tempest.

Bullshitted by Denny on June 16, 2006 11:43 AM

I could've sworn that the quote was actually “KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!” die you blood sucker... I could be wrong though.

Bullshitted by RedNeck on June 17, 2006 12:18 AM