Hair...

... sitting out on the deck just now enjoying the sunshine, I noticed that the breeze was tickling my shoulders slightly... at first I thought it must have been an insect that had lighted there... but as I craned my neck around to look, I noticed that my shoulder was covered with extremely short, fine hair....

... amazing... I'd never noticed that before....

... so I began scoping out my chest and arms... and sure enough, they are all covered with the same fine hairs... except for the area of my arms down from mid-bicep.. there the hair is nearly an inch long.. but still very fine and blondish-red... in the sunlight, the almost appeared as copper...

... my chest is barren like my shoulders... excepting for the tiny hairs that I didn't know existed until a few minutes ago.... my abdomen, too, is relatively hairless... until the northernmost beginning of the Happy Trail just above my navel...

... and it was at this point in my observations that my finger absentmindedly found its way to my left nostril and explored slightly... nudging an errant hair back into line, grasping it, straightening it, and then plucking it out.... and as you do in situations like that, I inspected it... coarse, wiry and dark red... totally opposite to the baby-like ones being touched by the wind on my shoulders... it was pretty damn interesting, let me tell you...

.. obviously this led me to explore further... so I dropped trou out on the deck and compared the nasal hair to my pubic area... not a match, I'm happy to report... but then again, the hair in that area was totally unlike either my shoulderhair, armpit hair, chesthair, or armhair...

... it was quite perplexing, standing there with my pants down on the deck with the breeze tousling my fuzzy body... I mean, does anyone know about this?.. exactly how many different types of hair do us humans have on our bodies?...

by Eric on April 23, 2006 | Bullshit (22) | TrackBack (0) | Psycho Rants
Bullshit So Far

Lanugo: baby hair usually gone by the time they are born or soon afterwards
Vellus: short pigment-less covering almost the entire body
Terminal: the hairs that you see and are most concerned with. These can be broken down into a number of subcategories based on locations (axillary, cerebral, pubic, etc.) and can provide variations, but it also depends on the person and usually is highly dependent on testosterone levels and the way the follicles react to the testosterone. However, even though the appearance may be different, the basic structure of all terminal hair is the same. As hair thins, it reacts to testosterone and other hormone, reverting to a similar state as the vellus hairs.

And you are begging for the ladies to start going to your "for pay" site... crotch-blogging, free-balling, and now open nakedness on the back deck while you proclaim your self examination? Just make a calendar and sell it...

Bullshitted by RSM on April 23, 2006 02:50 PM

... sorry, man... I just didn't have anything else to blog about... I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel over here....

Bullshitted by Eric on April 23, 2006 02:54 PM

You know, lots of guys *I* know play video games... Maybe you could try that...

And thanks for answering his question RSM - otherwise he might have gotten busy with the camera again. ;)

Bullshitted by Richmond on April 23, 2006 03:35 PM

Ack!

Bullshitted by Bou on April 23, 2006 03:45 PM

Geez Eric, you got me thinking -- you could write a whole chapter completely devoted to men and their body hair in Our Bodies Ourselves, the American wimmen's trusty book about female sexuality.

Bullshitted by Erica on April 23, 2006 05:44 PM

Eric,
And how does each type of hair know how long to grow? Armpit and pubic hair only grows so long. The hair on your arms and shoulders, a little shorter than that. What if it all grew as long as the hair on your head? Can you imagine having beaded braids on your ampit hair?

I'm just sayin'.....

Bullshitted by Jerry on April 23, 2006 06:27 PM

Dude... seriously... you need to get a job.

Bejus! I'm surprised that you didn't ANALyze your butt-hairs, too.

Bullshitted by Acidman on April 23, 2006 06:56 PM

.. I would have, Rob, but my ass ain't hairy...

Bullshitted by Eric on April 23, 2006 07:33 PM

Standing on your deck comparing a nose hair to one from your naughty bits? Maybe you ought to consider collecting stamps or some shit.

Bullshitted by Jim - PRS on April 23, 2006 07:52 PM

.... damn, Jim.... that's pretty brave considering I have photos of people painting your toenails.... back up, studly....

Bullshitted by Eric on April 23, 2006 08:04 PM

This...this was a wee bit disturbing...

Eyes burning! Brain..hurting! Must...drink...acid!

Bullshitted by Elisson on April 23, 2006 08:22 PM

.. goddamn, Elisson... at least I never posed with a kitchen-aid on my head....

Bullshitted by Eric on April 23, 2006 09:30 PM

TMI!! Getting just a wee bit too introspective, aren't ya? I'm sure that Fiona will tell you that you have little fine hairs on your butt just like on your neck, dude ... but it's really none of our bizness anywho.

Bullshitted by Barb on April 23, 2006 10:41 PM

Images of man on deck formed in mind...frightening images...must erase, must erase...

Bullshitted by John Climacus on April 24, 2006 01:21 AM

Why do I stop by here and read this? What mortal sin could be worth this agony? It might be time for a contract.

Bullshitted by jamesoldguy on April 24, 2006 06:18 AM

Yep, what acidman said

Bullshitted by GUYK on April 24, 2006 08:22 AM

Heh heh heh heh....Eric nekkid.

Bullshitted by Maeve on April 24, 2006 09:06 AM

I wish I had a deck where I could be naked. Nothing like the feel of the sun and the breeze on your birthday suit.

Bullshitted by Libby on April 24, 2006 09:31 AM

ya'll gotta understand porch life ...

Bullshitted by vicki on April 24, 2006 12:29 PM

I understand... completely.

Bullshitted by livey on April 24, 2006 09:54 PM

Just wait until the ear hairs start coming in.

Might as well invest in one of these now:

http://www.luggageden.com/black-decker-ovens/coultunoearh.html

Bullshitted by Harvey on April 26, 2006 08:52 AM

Well done!

Bullshitted by Patty on June 28, 2006 10:54 AM