... well, today sucked... all of you workin' people who swing by here and wag your fingers at my lifestyle should be content... all of that negative karma you've been sending my way finally paid off... I hope you retards are happy now.... I had a shitty day finally....

... overcast sky... depressing night last night... my cell phone died in the middle of an important conversation and the charger was seventy miles away... traffic was grinding... no appetite as I drove by a million restaurants..... and even a damned bluebird that had finally given up on life due to some bluebird depression committed suicide by flying head-on into my windshield as I was sitting at a traffic light... I wasn't even moving!... talk about depressing... when beasts of the field start offing themselves because they just can't take it any more, things are pretty bad.... little bastard slid down the windscreen and lay flopping in between my wiper blades... I had to get out of the car and heave his tiny carcass in between two SUVs that were in front of me...

.. alas, the only saving grace of today was the joy that I experienced when I followed the advice of my spiritual advisor, Skippy.. all the way up to Knoxville and back I screamed Warren Zevon songs at random people who were stuck in traffic with me... let me tell you, people, it works... it really, really does... everyone should own a copy of Zevon's Genius album... while it didn't fully cure what ails me, it sure helped to ease a few of the symptoms....

by Eric on February 03, 2006 | Bullshit (6) | TrackBack (0) | Psycho Rants
Bullshit So Far

You mean you just left ol' blue right there in the danged middle of the road? Sufferin'?

Man, you should've put him under your wheel, and got him out of his misery. If I was a Blue Bird, that's what I'd want you to do.

PS: I'm sure they make these chargers that you can plug into your cigarette lighter, If Audi's have those, that can stay in your car, and keep your phone alive.

I've had to use said device from time to time when my battery crapped out on me. Seem's to happen every time I call Sam. And, well, you too 'far as that goes. You battery suckers you...

Bullshitted by RedNeck on February 3, 2006 04:22 PM

My day ended by my crushing a fuzzy bunny to death with the back rear right tire of my asexual mom-mobile. It was just that much better when I heard one of my boys say, "Mom! Did you feel that? What did you hit." Blech.

BTW, what Redneck said. Car chargers are the way to go. I use my car charger more than my home charger.

Bullshitted by Bou on February 3, 2006 07:02 PM

Here's hoping that you have a much better day tomorrow. (And I personally send NO bad vibes your way... 'Course I'm newly workin'...) ;)

Bullshitted by Richmond on February 3, 2006 07:05 PM

I put my head on the railroad tracks, waitin' for the "double E"
But the Railroad don't run no more, poor poor pitiful me.

Yeah, that one helps get me going too.

~She put me through sone changes, lord, sorta like a waring blender... Great line~

Bullshitted by tommy on February 3, 2006 07:27 PM

hell yeah!! did ya'll hear that? it paid off!! all that finger waggin bad kharma does pay off!! hooray!! something's finally working!!

just kidding, sorry bout the kharma, bro.

Bullshitted by shoe on February 3, 2006 09:28 PM

That was the fabled "Bluebird of Happiness" that pulled an Allman against your windshield, dude.


Anyhow, I personally have always said that you're living the life we all want and to hell with everyone who says you ought to get a job because they're just jealous. So this last batch of karma wasn't my fault. However, I would like to point out that the day after posting your little whine and cheese party, you left a smart-assed comment on my site about how work was gonna kill my ass. I cry foul, my slothful friend. The next batch of karma will be well-deserved and you won't get off so easy next time. Bluebird? Ha! You can probably expect a turkey buzzard through your windshield, so start wearing a goalie mask. As for me, I gotta go back into the friggin' office. Yes, on Super Bowl Sunday. Prick.

Bullshitted by zonker on February 5, 2006 12:04 PM