Trust...

.. I awoke this morning to a truly gruesome scene... as I was walking through the kitchen with a fresh cup of coffee, I glanced out the window into the back lawn... on either side of my nearly-completed patio, Fred and Ginger reclined.. I noticed their uncanny resemblance, in their own miniature way, to the lions of Trafalgar Square and laughed to myself... I stood there for a while and watched them... and then I noticed that they both were crouched upon juvenile rabbits.. headless, of course, and were leisurely crunching through fur, bone, and flesh...

... now, those two cats are the Wife's pride'n'joy... and I have to admit that even I occasionally enjoy their company.. they aren't snooty like most cats, and readily come when called... it is almost as if they imagine themselves dogs... but this morning I realized why, deep down, I dislike all cats... domesticated cats show a side of nature that cuts you to the bone... the hunt, kill, eat that is everyday survival... the problem is that even with "domestication", cats continue to follow their primal instincts... they are well fed and groomed... wanting for nothing... and yet the kill everything that happens to wander into their path....

... I have to admit, it pissed me off when I realized what those cats had done.... and I thought about putting the Wife to an ultimatum today.. either get them de-clawed, or stop feeding them.... after all, they are going to hunt, kill, and eat regardless of whether they are hungry or not... so if that's what they want, at least their victims can be for actual sustenance... OR have the Vet cut their switchblades off... render them slightly less harmful....

... domesticating cats is wrong... they are never 100% domesticated anyway... they are like miniature tigers who happen to let you pat them on the head once in a while... and if they weighed 200lbs, WE would be on the menu... and they'd kill us just because we moved... argue all you want, but it is true.. we admire some of their traits, sure... their grace and speed.. the beauty of their physical design... but some others are just plain offensive... cats are wild animals in their hearts... and on a very deep level, I simply don't trust them..

by Eric on August 07, 2005 | Bullshit (19) | TrackBack (2) | SWG Stories
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Bullshit So Far

Ahhh.

It would appear you have no garden...

; )

Bullshitted by Christina on August 7, 2005 11:12 AM

We chose to de-claw my cat when he was a kitten, and he doesn't know he has no claws. However, don't let them outside again if you declaw them - no offense also means no defense (yes, mine is permanently an indoor kitty). Also - removng their claws at this stage in their lives is not the same as doing so when they are babes. They'll survive, but it's not a good thing. They've learned to maneuver with claws as part of the equation - taking them now would be kinda cruel.

Bullshitted by Barb on August 7, 2005 11:13 AM

You have to admit that you enjoy their company once in awhile? Um, I've been on the phone when you were talking to one of them.

"Here Kitty kitty kitty. Oh you're sooooo pretty. My little schmoopikins!"

Heh.

Bullshitted by sadie on August 7, 2005 03:40 PM

Nature is a harsh and cruel mistress. The cat is merely doing what eons of genetic programming have told him is vital...he kills, even without need. The skills must be kept honed, passed to the next generation.

You are absolutely right, Eric...if every cat in the world suddenly weighed 200 pounds, we would be in dire trouble! Anyone ever tried to capture or hold a cat that didn't want to participate? A 10 pound cat can inflict some grievous wounds. Multiply that 10 pounds by 20 and imagine the possibilities. A 200 pound man might last 30 seconds, unless the cat just wanted to toy with him. Then he would wish it were ONLY 30 seconds...

Still, I wouldn't de-claw them. They have natural predators, too, and other than speed claws are their only defense.

Bullshitted by Wayne on August 7, 2005 04:07 PM

Domesticated animals still have natural drives.. all of them. We just think that they become our friends through domestication. And maybe they do.

I wouldn't de-claw them. As you pointed out, it's nature. Perhaps because it was baby bunnies, it is disturbing. Were it a snake, I'd be cheering the bastards on!

No, I wouldn't worry about it until you get up one morn, and see them munching on a neighbour kid. Then it's shotgun time.

Bullshitted by That 1 Guy on August 7, 2005 04:35 PM

schmoopikins? LOL

Bullshitted by livey on August 7, 2005 05:17 PM

... for the record, I have never said "schmoopikins" in my entire life...

Bullshitted by Eric on August 7, 2005 05:55 PM

Just so you *know* it's called "de-clawing" but it's really not like somehow they just remove the nails. It's the entire first digit. So look at yer fingers and imagine them snipped off at the knuckle between the first and second digit. YUK.

But before I *knew* that tid-bit, I did have my cat de-clawed... and she still caught birds and small mammals...because that IS their nature and prediliction. Sorry!! (And if they were bigger you *might* be on the menu. LOL)

Bullshitted by Karen on August 7, 2005 08:16 PM

This is why I own 2 small dogs.

Bullshitted by New York Moments on August 7, 2005 08:46 PM

Cody - the puppy - almost got a rabbit the other morning. Damn that dog is fast. But anyway - cats that are outdoors have to be able to defend themselves. I've just either always kept them in side, except for the barn cats of course.

Bullshitted by Tammi on August 7, 2005 09:26 PM

We have 3 cats. We keep them indoors. End of story. They are cats - they will catch and kill, after maiming and "playing" with, anything that moves. I have been known to rescue silly lizards that make the mistake of wandering onto our porch - and hence, get caught by one of the 3 kitties.

Keep them indoors. That way, you can live with the illusion that they are pets - and they WILL appreciate your love and affection. And then they can't kill bunnies, bunny babies and small birds that weren't quick enough.

Cats should be kept indoors.

Bullshitted by suzeisnotfooledbyislam on August 7, 2005 10:48 PM

Good luck finding a vet who will still do declawing without giving you a hard time about it. It's cruel and inhumane now. I had to tell my vet that she'd see something REALLY cruel and inhumane if my recent addition clawed my livingroom set.

Bullshitted by Chablis on August 8, 2005 03:56 AM

Reason number 5,231 why we have dogs.... Poor Bunnies.

Bullshitted by Richmond on August 8, 2005 10:49 AM

Our two kitties have their claws and will never see the world from the outside looking in. They have a nice big cage, called house and they are content when I turn on cat TV (door wall overseeing bird feeder), and I plan on keeping it that way. De-clawing is cruel, so we clip their claws every two weeks. It's good to know they can defend themselves if they need to!)

Bullshitted by Kat on August 8, 2005 12:18 PM

A good cat is a dead cat!

Especially those mother fockers that live behind us that think our bushes, that have been replaced 3 times because the urine is killing them, is their litter pan.

I hate cats.

Bullshitted by Machelle on August 8, 2005 02:09 PM

it's cats being cats. it is sad when they get the baby bunnies though. mine stay inside and do the same thing to waterbugs -- when they can be bothered to.

hope the week gets better ... great song.

Bullshitted by justrose on August 8, 2005 07:11 PM

Wow, they sound like good hunters.

Where do you live? I'll take them off your hands this afternoon.

Get a cat that's not a good hunter (they have to be taught.) You can rest easy, knowing that the FDA says a *few* mouseturds aren't going to kill you. Well, as long as the mice don't have hantavirus, and even then the good new about hantavirus is that the coma precludes any spirit-destroying regret.

Bullshitted by Jones on August 8, 2005 07:17 PM

And man will stop at a McDonalds to get a ham and egg in the morning before going hunting. It's the thrill of the chase, the pursuit, and the sweet reward at the end.

Cause c'mon you know when people come home after hunting and are lugging in the meat, the cat thinks, "Showoff."

Bullshitted by Cythen on August 10, 2005 12:55 PM

Quoted and linked for Thur
'Quotes I like Day'
thank you

Bullshitted by GrampaPinhead on August 11, 2005 03:51 AM